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Wikipedia:Featured article review/Iranian peoples/archive2

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The following is an archived discussion of a featured article review. Please do not modify it. Further comments should be made on the article's talk page or at Wikipedia talk:Featured article review. No further edits should be made to this page.

The article was removed by YellowAssessmentMonkey 02:09, 26 July 2010 [1].

Iranian peoples

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Review commentary

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Iranian peoples (edit | talk | history | protect | delete | links | watch | logs | views)

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Notified: Khoikhoi, Tajik, Dbachmann (all editors with more than 50 edits who have been active in 2010 and are not blocked), WP Turkey, WP Central Asia, WP Kurdistan, WP Iran, WP Ethnic groups (all projects which rated it top or high importance).

This is a 2006 FA that has not been reviewed since the month of its promotion. There are numerous issues that need to be addressed for this article to remain at FA status, mainly regarding prose and referencing:

  • The prose needs some serious work. First sentence that jumped out at me: "The name Iran, Iranian is itself equivalent to Arya/Aryan,". Why the comma between Iran and Iranian? Also, "itself" is redundant - just say "is equivalent to". This is one of the main problems.
  • Over-referencing in a few places. For example, why does the statement "The name Iran, Iranian is itself equivalent to Arya/Aryan, where Iran means “land of the Arya”" need seven references?
  • Under-referencing in other places - statistics and conjecture go un-cited in many places. A few are already marked with fact tags. This is also one of the main problems.
  • Pick one version of punctuation/reference placement and stick with it. Some places have the reference before the punctuation, some after, and some have punctuation on both sides of the reference. Either of the first two are correct, as long as it is done consistently; the latter is never correct.
  • Further information templates should go at the beginnings of sections, not in the middle as is done in the Later developments sections.
  • Numerous dab links and dead links; some of the latter are already marked but others are not.
  • References are formatted extremely inconsistently and some web references are missing access dates.

I have noted the two above (prose and under-referencing) that are the biggest problems. Dana boomer (talk) 01:28, 30 June 2010 (UTC)[reply]

Lots of things are wrong with this article. If I didn't know the FA process is completely broken I would be wondering how it ever became FA.

First of all, the map is an abomination. I made an effort to replace it with an overview map working as a thumbnail, but this failed due to ethnic bickering so I gave up on it. As long as we don't replace this with something acceptable I don't think anything else needs to be discussed. But there is lots to discuss then. So there is a "Genetics" h2 section, with a "Genetic roots" subsection. Huh? There is a "diversity" h2(!) section that more or less consists of a random comment. There is a "Etymology and usage" with the main article Arya#Etymology, and then there is another(!) h2 section called "Self designator as Arya". I could go on. What this article badly needs is attention from an experienced editor. I have tried to give it such attention in the past, but the usual Iranian ethnic chauvinism going on on talkpage quickly convinced me I was wasting my time. Actually, I do wonder how this was ever smuggled through FAC. --dab (𒁳) 10:19, 30 June 2010 (UTC)[reply]

I agree with dab. The article needs a lot of improvements, and an effective control system is needed to keep ethnic POV out of it. As for the map: I do not think that it's factually incorrect, but some polishing may be needed. Tajik (talk) 13:29, 30 June 2010 (UTC)[reply]

FARC commentary

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Featured article criterion of concern are neutrality, prose, sourcing and MOS. YellowMonkey (vote in the Southern Stars and White Ferns supermodel photo poll) 02:22, 12 July 2010 (UTC)[reply]
The above discussion is preserved as an archive. Please do not modify it. No further edits should be made to this page.
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