Wikipedia:Peer review/Beebo the God of War/archive2

Beebo the God of War

Previous peer review

I've listed this article for peer review because I have made significant imrpovements since the last PR, such as reaching GA and then some. I hope to get this to be my first FA but would like some feedback

Thanks, Questions? four Olifanofmrtennant (she/her) 03:06, 30 July 2024 (UTC)

Comments from TheDoctorWho

Hi again, fancy seeing you here. First peer review reply, but I happened to come across this while checking on mine and figured I'd help you out and leave some comments. I'm going to be a bit picky here, to hopefully make it less stressful on you by the time you get to FAC:

• Development and filming
  • You list the date filming starts, why not the day it ends (October 25)? It's included in that same source.
  • Some of the information in the development section, particularly the sentence reading "During a panel at a fan convention in Vancouver, the show's cast explained that Beebo represented an attempt from the writers to introduce further chaos into the series' plot." should probably be in writing instead, given that it discusses the writers' intentions with the script.
  • "spin-off Christmas special" is a major WP:BLUESEA. I'd assume most readers know what Christmas is, perhaps change it to just "spin-off Christmas special"
  • Link Beebo Saves Christmas here as well
• Writing
  • "The final draft of the script was finished the next day." - Next day from when?
  • The start and end dates of filming are listed there. I'd suggest removing them from the writing section given that the section above is titled what it is.
• Casting
  • Is Victor Garber's character Martin Stein? If so, I'd explain that in the preceding sentence. Something along the lines of "This is the first episode of Legends of Tomorrow to not feature Victor Garber as a series regular due to the death of his character, Martin Stein, in the previous episode."
  • "Drameh's departure resulted from Garber's exit from the series." - Is there any way to elaborate slightly more on this? I checked out the source attached to that claim and it says "Also, actor Franz Drameh didn't choose to leave Legends of Tomorrow because he was going to be very busy with a Broadway engagement like Victor Garber did". This would almost imply the opposite unless I'm misunderstanding it? If it refers to the characters written exit through plot (rather than the actors departure for real-world reasons), it needs slightly reworded.
• Release
  • Link [[Nielsen Media Research#Ratings/share and total viewers|share]]
  • "Down 1.2 million viewers from the previous episode, but up 100 thousand from the following one." doesn't quite feel complete, perhaps replace the full stop after 18-49 with a comma.
  • Also link the "previous episode" in the preceding sentence ([[Crisis on Earth-X#Part 4|previous episode]])
  • "The episode was the third-highest viewed of the season season." - Duplicate "season", also another BLUESEA.
• Reception
  • Critical response
    • "Zeid Abughazaleh said that although Beebo "jump[ed] the shark", the episode "land[ed] on its feet" and brought weirdness to the series." - mention the publication just to keep in line with all subsequent reviews
    • That last review is out there in an island by itself. Either merge it with the preceding paragraph or split the entire section into two, more-evenly split paragraphs
  • Beebo
    • I'd slightly trim that second paragraph, perhaps terminating it after "Diskin reprising his role." The remainder leans into casting information on the special which seems outside the scope of this episode, and is a direct duplicate of the information at Legends_of_Tomorrow#Christmas_special (which is linked).
• References
  • Consider replacing the WP:NEWSWEEK source, if possible
  • Most other references look okay from a quick glance. However, let it be noted that I didn't personally check them all for supported statements or quality. I'd also be prepared to defend or replace any of your sources when questioned. FAC source reviews are intense (more so than GA and FL), and is what I'd consider it the most stressful part of my (currently) one and only FA. Here's a specific link to the source review of that candidacy, you might glance over it just to be prepared on the type of questions that may be asked about sources. Same with the source spot-check.
• External links
  • Remove {{Arrowverse}} per WP:BIDI.

I really hope this is helpful, please feel free to ping me if you have any questions, and do drop me a message on my talk page if you do actually take this to FAC, and I'll leave any more comments I have and/or my support at such time! TheDoctorWho (talk) 04:53, 31 July 2024 (UTC)

I belive I have addressed your concerns. I will definitely take a look at that FAC! Questions? four Olifanofmrtennant (she/her) 08:53, 1 August 2024 (UTC)

It certainly has improved! If I have time, I'll give it another read-thru in a couple days (but may not leave another message if I don't see anything glaringly obvious). Best of luck with your future endeavors on this article. TheDoctorWho (talk) 03:51, 2 August 2024 (UTC)

Comments from BP!

Hi. I'm not sure about this article's quality tbh, after looking at the reception section. I couldn't really specify whats the problem (the worst part is, I'm not native in English), but it could be improved further. I'm not sure if the Analysis section would be fine either (I may be wrong). Apologize if I couldn't specify the issues, but just gonna let you know. 🍕BP!🍕 (🔔) 23:28, 19 October 2024 (UTC)

FAC PR sidebar

I have added this article to Template:FAC peer review sidebar. Please consider reviewing articles listed there. Z1720 (talk) 01:50, 4 August 2024 (UTC)

Hello OlifanofmrTennant, it has been over a month and almost two since the last comment. Is this ready to be closed and for FAC? dxneo (talk) 06:49, 26 September 2024 (UTC)

Likely no I've still got a lot of things to do before FAC. Sadly I haven't gotten very much feedback on this Questions? four Olifanofmrtennant (she/her) 06:51, 26 September 2024 (UTC)