Wikipedia

Wikipedia:Peer review/Drive (2011 film)/archive1

< Wikipedia:Peer review

Drive (2011 film)

edit
Toolbox
Article (edit | visual edit | history) · Article talk (edit | history) · Watch • Watch peer review

I've listed this article for peer review because I feel like it's definitely FA-worthy as it stands. This is one my favorite of films of its time and I can say I find it very humbling and rewarding to populate as a FA, considering it's already been made a GA by someone else. It would really be great if someone could help me out on this from top to bottom.

Thanks, Bluesphere 08:06, 19 May 2017 (UTC)[reply]

Comments from Aoba47
  • I decided to provide some comments on here as I felt really bad as I had agreed to provide my input prior to going on a WikiBreak. I hope you find these comments to be helpful, and good luck with getting more comments on this review, and the FAC process for this when it does reach that point. My comments are below:
  • I would be more descriptive with the ALT text for the infobox image. Same goes for the image of Christina Hendricks.
  • Just a clarification question, but has the genre of the film been dispute enough to warrant a direct citation in the lead on it? I am not saying that it is incorrect or should be removed as I do not have any particular issue with it, but I just wanted to clarify this with you.
  • The final sentence of the lead's first paragraph feels a little incomplete to me, and I would suggest rewording to avoid ending it on the word "star".
  • Is the French translation required in the link to Best Director Award (Cannes Film Festival)? I am not sure about this, and just wanted your clarification on it.
  • I would move the following sentence "The soundtrack from Drive was listed on Spin magazine's list of 40 Movie Soundtracks That Changed Alternative Music." to the "Soundtrack" section as it deals more the reception/critical reviews of the soundtrack than the development of the music/score for the film itself.
  • I would combine the final two paragraphs of the "Critical reception" subsection as they focus on the more negative reviews of the film, and to avoid a one-sentence paragraph.
  • I would link Bastille in the track list of the soundtrack. He was linked earlier in the article, but it would be helpful to link him again in this context.

Wonderful work with this article. I hope you found this at least somewhat helpful. Good luck with this! Aoba47 (talk) 15:11, 30 May 2017 (UTC)[reply]

Aoba47, just wanna say that I'm really grateful that, despite your hectic schedule and sudden Wikibreak, you provided the comments that I requested as a courtesy. :) Bluesphere 07:48, 31 May 2017 (UTC)[reply]
Comments from Freikorp
  • "fond of his neighbor, (played by Carey Mulligan)" - I would expect the characters to be named in the lead, i.e "fond of his neighbor, Irene (Carey Mulligan), but your choice.
  • "where he learns that ... Blanche and Cook planned to re-steal the money" - this raises the question of how he learns they plan to re-steal it
  • "(the first one is stabbed in the neck by the Driver with a curtain rod and the second one is shot dead)" - firstly try and avoid writing in brackets unless it is absolutely unavoidable. It's easily avoidable here, but more to the point, it's not overly important to the plot how he kills them. I suggest you just remove this or at the very least, shorten it.
  • "The movie ends with the Driver driving away into the night." - do not write in this tense in plots. I.e don't say "The movie ends", just say how it ends.
  • "Producer Marc E. Platt contacted actor Ryan Gosling regarding Drive early on" - can you be more specific? "Early on" is a bit vauge.
  • "Winding Refn doesn't watch casting tapes", "Winding Refn hadn't seen An Education" - have a look at MOS:N'T and consider rewording this accordingly.
  • "As Downtown Los Angeles had changed for the better," - I'm sure you could word this better. I'm assuming you're implying that the neighbourhood has improved in its physical appearance.
  • "Winding Refn shot Drive digitally with an Arri Alexa camera (pictured)" - '(pictured)' seems a bit redundant, I mean, it's clearly what the photo is of.
  • Style and inspiration - there's a lot of un-attributed quotes in this sections. I think this may cause concern at FAC.
  • "but one positive review said it "can't win, won't win" Cannes's top prize" - consider attributing this quote. Did the reviewer give specific indication to why they thought it couldn't win?
  • Home media - your section doesn't give any reviews of the DVD/Blu-rays or mention anything they contain. Have a look at the home media sections for either The Fifth Element or Final Fantasy: The Spirits Within and consider doing something similar to what you see there.
  • Your critical reception section is much longer than I was expecting. You might get asked to trim it at FAC, but it might be better to cross that bridge when you come to it. Reviewers there will look at the section as it is now and will at least be able to see a thorough collection of reviews and may have specific suggestions of which should have more weight than others.
  • Have a read of WP:FILMMUSIC and consider whether the track listing should be included or whether the notable songs can just be mentioned in prose.

Hope this helps. Good luck and feel free to contact me when this gets nominated for FAC. I'll be happy to trade reviews again unless I'm in the middle of exams, or if my dog has chewed through my internet cable under my house again. I waited a whole week for a repairman to come just to find out that's what the problem was haha :) Freikorp (talk) 11:37, 14 June 2017 (UTC)[reply]

Retrieved from "https://en.wikipedia.org/w/index.php?title=Wikipedia:Peer_review/Drive_(2011_film)/archive1&oldid=1051927346"