Wikipedia:Peer review/The Chronicles of Narnia/archive1

The Chronicles of Narnia

This peer review discussion has been closed.
I've listed this article for peer review because I have done a few cleanup on it and I sort of want a GA push. The only section I haven't tried to improve is the in other media section (which I know is the worse due to a few good article nominations) which I would want your ideas on how to improve it. So I am all ears on what problems with it that can hinder it from being a good article and how to improve it some more.

Thanks, Jhenderson ⁷⁷⁷ 21:11, 25 March 2011 (UTC)

Comments by Jake fuersturm (talk) 05:21, 26 March 2011 (UTC): Hi, I just thought I'd leave you with a few questions/comments/observations. Someone else with more experience should still conduct a formal peer review. Disclaimer: I'm not hugely familiar with the Narnia works (more of a Tolkien guy ...), but perhaps that's a good thing: by pointing out things which probably aren't obvious to a casual reader, but which may be obvious to a C.S. Lewis fan.

I am Tolkien fan as well as a C.Lewis fan. It's possible to be fans of both because they were friends. :) Jhenderson ⁷⁷⁷ 19:58, 26 March 2011 (UTC)

• Writing - might be worth fleshing-out more, perhaps discussing the inspriration behind the novels and the universe in which they are set. I realise that there's a detailed section below dealing with the influences on his work, but I'm wondering if it's not worth splitting up the personal influences from the literary influences? It just seems a little thin for a discussion on the how of Lewis' conception of the Narnian universe, and also the why (i.e. did he just do it for fun, or was he trying to get a point across about something?)

• "The books were written in neither the order they were originally published nor in the chronological order in which they are currently presented" - grammar check. Something sounds wrong here, perhaps "The books were neither written in the order they were originally published, nor were they written in the chronological order in which they are currently presented"?

Already fixed. :) Jhenderson ⁷⁷⁷ 19:58, 26 March 2011 (UTC)

• Publication history - nice succinct discussion on the American publication history, but nothing about the United Kingdom and abroad? What about foreign language translations? This is an iconic series, and it might be interesting to note the number of editions the books have been through over the years, and the breadth of it's international audience. I realise that you did discuss this (briefly) in the introductory paragraph

Th idea of adding something new sounds tough. I'll see with what I can do. I plan on finding sources eventually. Jhenderson ⁷⁷⁷ 19:58, 26 March 2011 (UTC)

It was just a thought, seeing as how I've been on the receiving end of a number of firefights over notability :) ... In your case, you're likely to get a pass on that - I can't see how anyone could ever successfully (or even attempt to) argue that C.S. Lewis/Narnia isn't notable, but the general principle applies. The Lord of the Rings article is a really good example (I'm surprised no one's tried to bring that article up to FA ...) -- Jake fuersturm (talk) 20:47, 26 March 2011 (UTC)

It was a FA at one time. It was delisted.Jhenderson ⁷⁷⁷ 19:28, 27 March 2011 (UTC)

• The Narnian universe - there are no citations in this entire section, so I'm assuming that all the summaries you provide are straight distillations of what appear in the main articles referred to?

Yes it's just a summary of main article. I did think about it just being it smaller and more of a premise of the story (sort of what The Lord of the Rings article has. What do you think about that?Jhenderson ⁷⁷⁷ 19:58, 26 March 2011 (UTC)

Ironically, the LOTR article is B-class, and yours is GA, so I wouldn't really sweat it :) Overall I think the section just seems to be missing something, I can't quite put my finger on it. I'm not saying its bad, but it needs something extra. I'll have a thought and perhaps I'll take a crack at it when I get a chance. -- Jake fuersturm (talk) 20:55, 26 March 2011 (UTC)

Both B-Classes actually. I did have plans to maybe fix up that article too if I can. Jhenderson ⁷⁷⁷ 19:28, 27 March 2011 (UTC)

• "Most of The Chronicles of Narnia take place in Lewis' constructed world of Narnia." Does this mean that most of the story elements take place in Narnia (i.e. settings switch between Narnia and Earth), or does it mean that most (but not all) of the books are set primarily in Narnia, and some in other corners of the multiverse?

Only in the book The Horse and the Boy takes place in only Narnia but every other book starts first appearing in this real world and the protagonists gets transported to Narnia some magical way. Jhenderson ⁷⁷⁷ 19:58, 26 March 2011 (UTC)

• "Lewis largely populates his stories with two distinct classes of inhabitants." - When you say largely, does this mean there are others not belonging to these two classes?
• "Lewis does not limit himself to a single source; instead he borrows from many sources and adds a few more of his own to the mix." Examples of sources?

Well I do believe the article is referring to mythology and cosmology. Just like what the section Influences from mythology and cosmology is talking about. Jhenderson ⁷⁷⁷ 19:58, 26 March 2011 (UTC)

• Geography - so, Narnia is both the name of the world, and one of the nations in that world?

Correct. See Narnia (world) and Narnia (country). Jhenderson ⁷⁷⁷ 19:58, 26 March 2011 (UTC)

• Reading Order - I would be inclined to move this higher up in the article, perhaps even as sub-section to Series. Closer integration of the two would make it easier to discuss how the internal chronology relates to the publication history, and the controversy over reading order [and from a technical standpoint, as it is currently structured the reader needs to do a fair amount of scrolling back and forth, and I'm reading this in 1600 x 900 ....)

I can move it. You can to if you want to too.:) Jhenderson ⁷⁷⁷ 19:58, 26 March 2011 (UTC)

• Perhaps it would help if you briefly described what each of the four categories means, before you get into the more in-depth discussion of the pros/cons for each.
• you also state that "Under dispute is the placement of two volumes, The Magician's Nephew and The Horse and His Boy" and that "The "reading order" of the other five books is not disputed". If that's the case, then is it really all that important to include "Written Order" and "Final Completion Order"?

• Also, I'm not really clear on the distinction between "Written Order" and "Final Completion Order". I went back to the brief summaries for each book, but it wasn't apparent to me the difference between The Magician's Nephew and The Last Battle in this context, unless you mean that of the two, that although TMN was published first, TLB was actually written first?

Not really one of my statements. Would you rather those two orders be removed? Jhenderson ⁷⁷⁷ 19:58, 26 March 2011 (UTC)

• Christian Parallels and Influences on Narnia - Have you considered somehow integrating the two? I'm thinking that a discussion of the influences would have more meaning if placed within the context of Lewis' Christian faith (and since he was an adult convert, I'm guessing that his perspectives on Christianity would be quite different from someone who had been raised from birth as a Christian).

Sounds simple. :) Jhenderson ⁷⁷⁷ 19:58, 26 March 2011 (UTC)

Sorry, yeah, I realise that it's easier said than done :P - I'll have a think about how that might work -- Jake fuersturm (talk) 17:32, 27 March 2011 (UTC)

• Block quotation beginning: "Some people seem to think that I began by asking myself ..." - needs a cite ref

At least I know it's from From Other World. So a cite book might work. Jhenderson ⁷⁷⁷ 19:58, 26 March 2011 (UTC)

• Influence on popular culture - this is probably the weakest section in the article, and needs to read a bit less like a list. Perhaps flesh out the discussion part, and discuss the importance of Narnia on shaping popular culture
• Controversies and Reception: influence of religious viewpoints - another area where I think more closely integrating the discussion would benefit by providing context from one to the discussion of the other
• Narnia in other media - Perhaps it would make more sense to scrap Influence on popular culture entirely and integrate the various examples here instead.

That can be done. :) Jhenderson ⁷⁷⁷ 19:58, 26 March 2011 (UTC)

I hope this helps! Cheers, Jake

• Is there a reason why there's no "Characters" section? Figure that at least Aslan, the Pevensies and a few others deserve a brief mention, but I don't want to add one in until I know that there wasn't a specific reason for this omission. -- Jake fuersturm (talk) 17:09, 27 March 2011 (UTC)

• • I will be honest I did think about that. And you can go right ahead and do it if you like. Aslan, the four Pevensie children, Eaustace Scrubb, Jill Pole, Digory Kirke, Polly Plummer, White Witch are just a few of good examples that can be added. Even though most of the important ones are linked on the Chronicles section. Jhenderson ⁷⁷⁷ 19:28, 27 March 2011 (UTC)

CLOSE PEER REVIEW REQUEST - Per discussion with Jhenderson777 (see: User talk:Jake fuersturm#Peer review Narnia) we have agreed to close the peer review while we continue to restructure the article, and will resubmit when we think it's ready. -- Jake fuersturm (talk) 22:13, 28 March 2011 (UTC)