Wikipedia:Peer review/Wolf's Rain/archive1

Wolf's Rain

I've listed this article for peer review because I believe it has been significantly improved over the last month. Many parts have been completely rewritten and the article has been completely restructured to better follow the anime/manga MOS. Relevant information that was missing before, such as manga details and reception, has been added and the article has gone from having only 2 references to 27. I think it is ready to move from Start to B class, but would like outside opinions has I have done most of the work on its improvements. I'm also looking for feedback on remaining work that may be needed before it is ready for GA or FA status.

Thanks in advance, Collectonian (talk) 05:08, 31 December 2007 (UTC)[reply]

A script has been used to generate a semi-automated review of the article for issues relating to grammar and house style. If you would find such a review helpful, please click here. Ruhrfisch _><>°^° 02:06, 5 January 2008 (UTC)[reply]

Thanks. I'm glad the script actually notes which weasely words it found, cause I can never figure out which ones are bad. :) One thing I didn't quite get, though, is it said the lead needs expansion even though the lead is 3 paragraphs long and, as far as I can, summarizes the article well. Collectonian (talk) 02:17, 5 January 2008 (UTC)[reply]

Review

Ideas if you go for GA.

Move up the Poland flagicon with France so their is only one line for Canal+ in the other network section of the infobox.
Add this line behind Keiko Nobumoto in the author section of the manga infobox: <br/> Toshitsugu Iida (Art).
Need a space on both sides of the hyphen in the Released section of the OVA in the infobox.
Add Japan flagicon in front of Kodansha in the manga section of the infobox.
Make sure the release dates for the manga are right. Anime News Network has the Japanese releases at 2003-07-23 to 2004-02-23. Link full dates.
Change 26 to twenty-six in the lead and episodes sections.
Change recap to recapitulation or summary.
Change all OVA to original video animation.
Change 30 to thirty in the lead and episodes sections.
Change into Tankōbon to [[Tankōbon|bound volumes]]
I counted six different red links. Consider making stub articles or removing the links.
Plot section might be considered to be excessively detailed, consider trimming it down.
As it stands the character section is a regurgitation of the plot. This section is for the characters (mostly the major characters) in which they are described in modest detail, including voice actor credits (if applicable, see {{anime voices}}). If possible add a group pic. If it is a fair-use image, remember to add fair-use rational.
Change 15-18 to fifteen through eighteen in the reception section.
Change 24 to twenty-four in the episodes section.
The line:"The vocals were recorded around the world, including Japan, Poland, Brazil, the United States, and Italy to offer a diverse range of music and give the soundtrack an international flavor." seems to me as something that needed to be cited.
Change 44 to forty-four in the soundtrack section.
Some words used in the article are Words to avoid.
Drop the {{Contains Japanese text}} tag lower in the page. I find it works well between the External links sub header and the first link because the right side of the page is usually empty here anyhow.

(Duane543 (talk) 03:56, 8 January 2008 (UTC))[reply]

Thanks for the feedback. The line about the vocals is cited (#19, shared with the sentence after it). On the Japanese text box, there has been some discussion that it should be at the top as it applies to the whole article and people should be told at the start, not after they get to the end and already probably figured it out themselves ;-) I think I've taken care of the rest except the plot (will work on), and the Tankōbon, which is commonly used for manga discussions, so wasn't sure why it should be changed? I also got rid of all but two red links. I have a translation request in for Shin Vision's italian wikipedia article, and I will create a stub for Ota since he seems to be notable (has won some awards for his work on other series) :) Can you point out some of the words to avoid you spotted? I'm horrible at spotting those. Collectonian (talk) 04:04, 8 January 2008 (UTC)[reply]

Words to avoid that I seen (I did not put them in context, so it is up to your own judgment):

However: {Plot- paragraph 1, sentence 3}, {Manga adaptation differences- paragraph 1, sentence2}, {Manga adaptation differences- paragraph 2, sentence 2}
Supposed: {Plot- paragraph 1, sentence 3}
Report: {Reception- paragraph 5, sentence 1} Also missing a period on this sentence.
Note(s) (Note is a word to avoid, so I'm not sure about notes): {Manga- paragraph 2, sentence 2}, {Reception- paragraph 1, sentence 3}, {Reception- paragraph 4, sentence 3}

Tankōbon is considered to be a subject-specific term (A.K.A jargon).
As for the citation issue, they are two sentences. They both could be citied, but I believe the # 19 citation would be better suited on the line I questioned about above.
I'm almost sure that if you are using partial quotes, you should use ellipsis to show it. This is the sentence I'm talking about : One reviewer notes that the soundtrack "shows [Kanno's] skills as both composer and pianist," and is "a treat to hear."

(Duane543 (talk) 18:09, 8 January 2008 (UTC))[reply]

Ahhh...However is a word I use quite a bit too :-P I think I've taken care of everything. I went for volume for Tankōbon, though, as it is what is generally used in the english market over bound collection :-) Thanks again! Collectonian (talk) 19:10, 8 January 2008 (UTC)[reply]

Peace Out People, Wolves rock!!!!!! :)