Wikipedia:Reference desk/Archives/Language/2021 August 6
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August 6
editHow to fix this tiny sentence?
editSentence: At the direction of Michael, his man destroyed the house of Terry, who driven his car without permission, and loot Terry's cash, hacked Terry's email.
How to phrase this sentence grammatical? I tried my best but annoyed due to placement of "and" word Rizosome (talk) 14:15, 6 August 2021 (UTC)
- @Rizosome: Before making any suggestions, what exactly is going on? I would exercise caution with using pronouns with just this sentence as context, as there are three different people that he could refer to. It sounds like Terry drove Michael's car without permission, and Michael ordered someone to destroy Terry's house, loot his cash, and hack his email. —Tenryuu 🐲 ( 💬 • 📝 ) 14:25, 6 August 2021 (UTC)
Do reader can understand money and email belong to Terry from your sentence?: Terry drove Michael's car without permission, and Michael ordered someone to destroy Terry's house, loot his cash, and hack his email. Rizosome (talk) 14:49, 6 August 2021 (UTC)
- It's impossible to "fix" this sentence without knowing who did what to whom and when. You'd need to break it down into a chronological set of simple statements, in a list. A single sentence might then be reconstructed? Martinevans123 (talk) 15:00, 6 August 2021 (UTC)
- I read it as; Terry drove Michael's car. As a result, Michael gave the order to destroy Terry's house, loot Terry's cash, and hack Terry's email. Michael's man carried out Michael's order.Dja1979 (talk) 18:39, 6 August 2021 (UTC)
- It might also help if you told us where this came from. ←Baseball Bugs What's up, Doc? carrots→ 18:10, 6 August 2021 (UTC)
- Yes, the readers would understand that the money and email belonged to Terry in Tenryuu's phrasing. Your own wording jumps back and forth between tenses and inserts a parenthetical phrase about Terry into a rather awkward point, rendering it highly confusing. What is this sentence from? What are you attempting to describe? --Khajidha (talk) 20:43, 6 August 2021 (UTC)