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Wikipedia:WikiProject Articles for creation/Help desk/Archives/2020 March 19

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March 19

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03:12:51, 19 March 2020 review of draft by Mem271

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Hello,

Sam2727 suggested I was using emotive language in the Elizabeth Ford. He used one and only one phrase to decline the page 'passed on her sense of colour to her students'. This is fact as evidenced from their respective pages where Elizabeth Ford's students actually mention this. This is, in my mind, the whole point of referencing your pages. I also wondered whether Sam2727's reading was part of a gendered bias against certain kinds of descriptions rather than a quest for neutrality. Please note I am a published academic and am baffled by this rather arbitrary comment.

Regards,

Mem271

Mem271 (talk) 03:12, 19 March 2020 (UTC)[reply]

Mem271, Usually I wouldn't respond to a complaint about me, but I think this one I can at least in part answer (although of course other editors should still respond as well), and can provide some necessary explanation. I do agree that the templated message I chose was not very explanatory. However, I did believe that you were writing this article as an advertisement (which I now don't believe). I didn't realize that the templated message was so short and not helpful at all. I can provide other examples of the non-neutral tone of this article though. That was just a passing example. " received many awards," "became known for her keen sense of colour," " in 1987 was formative," "and a number of other collections both public and private." The best way I can put it is that the text of the article is flowery. You might want to read WP:Peacock. If it was worded just slightly differently, everything would be much better. Even if this language does mimic the tone of articles cited, that doesn't mean it isn't written in a neutral tone. For instance, I could find plenty of articles, say on Barack Obama, that describe him in very positive language. But that doesn't mean I can just write that in the article as if it was fact. Referencing the examples above, give a sample of the notable awards she has recieved, don't just say "many," expand on what was "formative" (and delete the word formative). Keen sense of color is broad. Being specific into what this sense of color was. "Keen sense of color" can mean many things to many different people. I'm no expert in art or anything like that, but I'm sure there's a way to be more specific here. What collections? Examples of them? And keep in mind these are just examples, but I'd be happy to provide more feedback if necessary.

And finally, I should note that by declining your article, I am not on a quest to indefinitely prevent it from entering the mainspace (i.e. become a Wikipedia article). All articles entering the mainspace should reasonably be able to avoid deletion, and that means being written in a neutral tone. I do think the subject is notable (although I can't access quite a bit of the sources you have to confirm for sure), and thus the subject can enter the mainspace once the article meets a certain minimum standard. Sam-2727 (talk) 03:45, 19 March 2020 (UTC)[reply]

I do think it would helpful to have another editor pitch in here since this one involves me. Please let me know if this is helpful in anyway or if I need to clarify more. Sam-2727 (talk) 03:46, 19 March 2020 (UTC)[reply]
Sam-2727, The more appropriate decline message for what you were trying to convey is the npov one. It gives links to better articles explaining how to avoid the use of peacock language.
Mem271, The accusation that Sam-2727 is showing gendered bias is very serious and completely unfounded and unwarranted. Please try to avoid making such accusations so flippantly and without evidence. Further, the idea that you being a published academic somehow should give you more credibility or weight is in contrast to the neutrality concerns you raised just one sentence before. Wikipedia has little to no care about you being a published academic. Sulfurboy (talk) 04:59, 19 March 2020 (UTC)[reply]

04:09:29, 19 March 2020 review of submission by 2600:8800:2A80:7E:6005:CA47:4DFC:2FFC

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2600:8800:2A80:7E:6005:CA47:4DFC:2FFC (talk) 04:09, 19 March 2020 (UTC)[reply]


I am a verified celebrity on all my social media platforms. I have worked with Justin Bieber. And also have Disney Source wiki Tour. https://glamourfame.com/celebrity-entertainer-dylan-collins-mitchell-musso-spill-tea-their-south-american-tour Mitvhel Musso and I. https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Mitchel_Musso

Dylan Houston Collins, born June 17, 1995, is an American Internet personality. He became popular for his viral Vine videos and his increasing presence and influence through other social media sites. Dylan Collins was born and raised outside of Nashville, Tennessee. At 15, he began working with the Disney Channel’s It Factor. He went on to advance in his acting career by auditioning and winning the leading spot on Disney’s Ant Farm, only to later turn it down due to personal reasons. Collins remained active in the entertainment industry, however. Collins soon made his return to acting in a crime drama, Living In Sin, with Raging Cowboy Productions. Because of his continued involvement in acting, hosting, and entertainment, he grew in popularity on social media sites and gained a following. By sixteen, he had hosted numerous meet and greet events such as Teen Hoot. Both he and friend Austin Mahone went on to attend Teen Hoot’s “Hoot-A-Ween” in 2011. ALong with Justin Bieber ex girlfriend and bestfriend, Christian and Caitlin Beadles. Collins began focusing on social media platforms such as Facebook, Vine, and Twitter to connect with fans. With over a quarter of a million followers on his verified Twitter account, he was able to interact with fans from across the globe. In early 2015, he became wildly popular with Brazilian fans in particular. They contacted him by the masses, causing Collins to trend both worldwide and #1 for the nation of Brazil on countless occasions, begging the “gringo” to begin a meet and greet tour in select Brazil cities during 2015. This nickname inspired the viral “Gringo” Vine, which became popular with Brazilians and American fans alike with over 7.3 million views and hundreds of knockoff videos. Collins continued to post popular videos on Vine, reaching over 34 million views within months of creating his account.

Verified Sites. https://twitter.com/DylanCollins95 https://www.youtube.com/user/dylancollins95 https://www.facebook.com/DylanCollinsOfficial/

04:35:38, 19 March 2020 review of submission by Sarahjervis71

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Hi. I was recently reviewed by a user named sulfurboy. I found him to be quite rude. He told me I need to completely rewrite my article to read less like an advertisement, but didn't give me any advice or constructive feedback on how to do that. I don't think my article even reads like an advertisement, so I don't know what I should change. Please help :( Here is the link to my article https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/User:Sarahjervis71/sandbox Sarahjervis71 (talk) 04:35, 19 March 2020 (UTC)[reply]

Sarahjervis71, If you view my critique of your submission as being "quite rude", that's on you. Constructive feedback was given to you previously in the first decline. This was quite clearly ignored and the article was resubmitted with little to no revision. The article has been rejected which means it will not be considered further at this time, in all likelihood it should probably have been considered for speedy deletion as it is unambiguously promotional. I would recommend reading the prescribed articles in the initial decline before submitting any more pages to avoid this in the future. Sulfurboy (talk) 04:50, 19 March 2020 (UTC)[reply]
sulfurboy thank you for your apology. I am not trying to promote anything, especially considering that this is a public school and no one would benefit anything from it being promoted. I am asking for help. I just don't know what part of my article sounds promotional. And I DID edit it between submissions, I entirely reworded the last section which I thought was the reason for the problem. Clearly I was wrong. I would like help. I understand I have done something wrong and I am asking for help delivered in a kind manner. Sarahjervis71 (talk) 05:04, 19 March 2020 (UTC)[reply]
The entire text reads as something like a promotional brochure, describing the school and what it does. Wikipedia articles should only summarize what independent reliable sources with significant coverage state about the school. The Globe and Mail piece about self-directed learning is largely based on interviews with staff and students, which make that source not independent. 331dot (talk) 07:43, 19 March 2020 (UTC)[reply]

07:05:13, 19 March 2020 review of submission by Iamfrzu07

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how can i improve this article and get published

Iamfrzu07 (talk) 07:05, 19 March 2020 (UTC)[reply]

Iamfrzu07, it seems as if you have requested deletion of the article. Was this your intention? Sam-2727 (talk) 14:52, 19 March 2020 (UTC)[reply]

08:58:08, 19 March 2020 review of submission by Joannatqh

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Please advice which portion requires citation. Joannatqh (talk) 08:58, 19 March 2020 (UTC)[reply]

Joannatqh, unfortunately your draft has been rejected, which means an AFC reviewer has determined that the subject likely isn't notable. That is, no amount of editing would get the article to a point where it would meet Wikipedia's notability criteria. If you would like to continue editing Wikipedia, I would recommend you move your efforts to editing pages that have already been created. Creating an article for Wikipedia is one of the hardest tasks for newcomers. Sam-2727 (talk) 14:55, 19 March 2020 (UTC)[reply]

08:59:52, 19 March 2020 review of submission by Unlearnify

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Unlearnify (talk) 08:59, 19 March 2020 (UTC)[reply]

Unlearnify, your article is missing an AFC template. I have added one to submit it for you. If this is not your intention, let me know and I'll delete the template. As the article stands, it is not adequately supported by sources that are independent and reliable. Wikipedia requires articles to be supported by multiple independent reliable sources (see WP:Notability for the specifics of this), but yours currently isn't. Also, if you have a connection to the subject you are writing about, please declare it following the instructions at WP:COI. If you have further questions, feel free to ask me them here. Sam-2727 (talk) 14:59, 19 March 2020 (UTC)[reply]

16:05:48, 19 March 2020 review of submission by 2600:6C5E:177F:E1F0:B979:72CD:4C05:B45A

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2600:6C5E:177F:E1F0:B979:72CD:4C05:B45A (talk) 16:05, 19 March 2020 (UTC)[reply]

The topic is not sufficiently notable for inclusion in Wikipedia, you have zero independent sources. Theroadislong (talk) 19:11, 19 March 2020 (UTC)[reply]

16:12:48, 19 March 2020 review of submission by Rogerkuznia

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Hi there, thanks for the feedback about my submission. I understand that it reads like "basically an advertisement", but everything is incredibly well-sourced and everything is fact-based. I have 13 sources in all. With all that said, I respect the judgment and am wondering what else I can include that will make it be deemed Wiki-worthy. For example, I see a Wiki article on Todd Pedersen, who also works in the solar industry, has been approved with similar wording as the one I have. Check it out if you have a second: https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Todd_Pedersen. Thank you for your time and consideration. Rogerkuznia (talk) 16:12, 19 March 2020 (UTC)[reply]

Hi Rogerkuznia. Wikipedia is forever a work in progress. It contains high quality articles and poor quality articles. The existence of an article does not mean it meets Wikipedia's policies and guidelines. So generally it isn't productive to compare a draft to other pages. The essay WP:OTHERSTUFFEXISTS may help you understand why. If you wish to learn from examples, be sure to use only Wikipedia's best articles. --Worldbruce (talk) 18:35, 19 March 2020 (UTC)[reply]
OK, thank you for sending me a link to that list of articles. What I would be looking for is direct feedback on how I can improve my article. Any thoughts to that end are appreciated! Rogerkuznia (talk) 20:47, 19 March 2020 (UTC)[reply]
You are being paid to edit why would you expect volunteers to help you? I suggest you spend a few hundred hours learning how Wikipedia works first. Theroadislong (talk) 21:02, 19 March 2020 (UTC)[reply]

18:44:26, 19 March 2020 review of submission by 1.186.196.61

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Why getting rejected for Sir vedang? 1.186.196.61 (talk) 18:44, 19 March 2020 (UTC)[reply]

Your draft has zero independent sources. Theroadislong (talk) 19:13, 19 March 2020 (UTC)[reply]

21:32:11, 19 March 2020 review of submission by Philip Gamertube

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Philip Gamertube (talk) 21:32, 19 March 2020 (UTC)[reply]


Can you tell me, what I have to change in my wiki article to make it acceptable? Philip Gamertube (talk) 21:34, 19 March 2020 (UTC)[reply]

Philip Gamertube Please read the Autobiography policy as to why attempting to write about yourself is not advisable. Wikipedia is not a place for people to tell the world about themselves. This is an encyclopedia, where a person must be shown with significant coverage in independent reliable sources to meet Wikipedia's special definition of a notable person. Unless independent sources have chosen on their own to write about you in depth, you would not merit a Wikipedia article. 331dot (talk) 21:36, 19 March 2020 (UTC)[reply]
If you wish to reply, please edit this section directly instead of creating a new one; if you are using the mobile version, you may find it easier to do this on the full desktop version. 331dot (talk) 21:37, 19 March 2020 (UTC)[reply]

23:22:39, 19 March 2020 review of submission by Papa.duku

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Hi! I would humbly like to know exactly what disqualifies this draft as I made sure to cite independent sources. Papa.duku (talk) 23:22, 19 March 2020 (UTC)[reply]

Papa.duku, actually I do believe that your sources establish notability (I see multiple news articles covering the subject of the article, which is typically enough for notability). Maybe I'm missing something, so perhaps DGG could give their reasoning for that here. If I was reviewing it, I still would've declined it though as I agree that your article is written like an advertisement. This phrase particularly (although there are other examples in the rather short prose section of this article) makes it seem like a press release: "best in men’s achievements across local industry, community, culture and public service." That is, it states opinion ("the best") as fact. Saying something like "Presented in categories of industry, community, culture, and public service" would be good for the lead, and then later on (perhaps in a section in the article), say that "according to the ceremony, the awardees in these categories represent "the best" of their repesctive areas" (or something to that effect). Hopefully this gets across the point to you. Let me know if you have further questions. Sam-2727 (talk) 03:18, 20 March 2020 (UTC)[reply]

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