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Wikipedia:WikiProject Military history/Assessment/SMS Hannover

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The following discussion is closed. Please do not modify it. Subsequent comments should be made on the appropriate discussion page. No further edits should be made to this discussion.
Promoted -- Ian Rose (talk) 07:49, 26 May 2010 (UTC)[reply]

SMS Hannover

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Nominator(s): Parsecboy (talk)
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Yet another German battleship. This was one of the last pre-dreadnoughts built by the Germans, and indeed completed after Dreadnought. I appreciate any and all comments aimed at improving the article. Thanks in advance to all reviewers. Parsecboy (talk) 15:50, 11 May 2010 (UTC) Parsecboy (talk) 15:50, 11 May 2010 (UTC)[reply]

Comments

  • Comments:
    • no dab links, ext links work (no action required);
    • the image lacks alt text (but I won't oppose on this, although I'd like to suggest adding it);
    • obsolete and obselescent are slightly different, however, you have "Hannover was obsolete" then "Despite her obsolescence"...(if they were obsolete, it should be "obsoleteness" according to the Macquaurie Dictionary) (in the lead);
    • in the Battle of Jutland section "4:00" (as in ...reached Horns Reef by 4:00 on 1 June") should be "04:00" for consistency;
    • in the World War I section, I'd like to suggest adding the following clause to the first sentence: "Following the outbreak of World War I, Hannover was tasked..." I feel this would improve the narrative flow (but it is only a suggestion);
    • in the World War I section I think "8" (as in 8 pre-dreadnoughts) should be "eight";
    • in the World War I section, should "mining operation" be "minelaying operation"?
    • in the Battle of Jutland section, Grand Fleet is linked for a second time (it was already linked in the section above);
    • in the Later actions section, the second sentence seems to be missing a word (Hannover the rest of II...);
    • in the Postwar section, "most modern components of Germany's surface fleet was..." (should it be "was" or "were"?)
    • some ISBNs have hyphens and others don't
    • in the References section the Herwig and Williamson sources should have endashes for date ranges in the titles;
    • is there a source for Note # 1;
    • Citations # 21 and 22 are to the same source (Tarrant, p. 195) and could be consolidated per WP:NAMEDREFS (you've done this for a few others already). — AustralianRupert (talk) 09:36, 14 May 2010 (UTC)[reply]
  • No worries. Looks good. I think there is still one outstanding, though: have you got a citation for Note # 1? — AustralianRupert (talk) 12:04, 14 May 2010 (UTC)[reply]
  • Support: all my concerns have been addressed. — AustralianRupert (talk) 13:31, 14 May 2010 (UTC)[reply]
  • Support--Sturmvogel 66 (talk) 04:25, 24 May 2010 (UTC)[reply]
  • Support One point for consideration though: many of the battle engagements cited in the Jutland section only give units in metric, and I for one can not think in metric. It may therefore be a good a good idea to add conversions for the sizes given in the section so the standard crowd can grasp what weapons were fired. Also, what classifies a vessel as a guard ship? The guns were removed but was anything added in their place? TomStar81 (Talk) 21:20, 25 May 2010 (UTC)[reply]
    • I usually only convert the first instance of a unit (especially for frequently repeated figures like the main battery guns) and then leave them with just the metric.
    • Only some of the guns were removed, but Staff isn't clear as to which guns. Groner states that in Reichsmarine service the ship retained its 28cm and 17cm guns, so I'd wager it was the 8.8cm guns that were removed, but I wouldn't add that without something stating as much. Parsecboy (talk) 21:31, 25 May 2010 (UTC)[reply]
The above discussion is preserved as an archive. Please do not modify it. Subsequent comments should be made on the appropriate discussion page, such as the current discussion page. No further edits should be made to this discussion.
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