Wikipedia:WikiProject Military history/Assessment/SMS Lothringen

The following discussion is closed. Please do not modify it. Subsequent comments should be made on the appropriate discussion page. No further edits should be made to this discussion.

Article promoted by Ian Rose (talk) via MilHistBot (talk) 12:20, 15 December 2018 (UTC) « Return to A-Class review list[reply]

SMS Lothringen

Instructions for nominators and reviewers

Nominator(s): Parsecboy (talk)

Featured article candidates/SMS Lothringen/archive1

Who'd have thought that I'd get the last battleship of the German Imperial Navy to a MILHIST A-class review? Lothringen was under repair during the Battle of Jutland and wasn't available when the rest of her squadron sortied with the German fleet for the battle. The ship was one of the few battleships retained by Germany after the war, though she was only used as a parent ship for minesweepers while Germany fulfilled the requirement to clear the North Sea of mines. Thanks to all who take the time to review the article. Parsecboy (talk) 12:09, 23 October 2018 (UTC)[reply]

Image review

File:German_battleship_SMS_Lothringen_underway_at_sea_before_1914_(ggbain.28288).jpg: if this is from the Bain collection, why is it believed to be USGov? Nikkimaria (talk) 16:08, 27 October 2018 (UTC)[reply]
- Good question - seems to have been a result of confusion between being held by the LoC and being a work of the US government. I've removed the US tag. Parsecboy (talk) 21:10, 19 November 2018 (UTC)[reply]

Support by Chetsford

I think this is just wonderful. I'm not all that fond of ship articles as a general rule, but I had a very enjoyable time reading this very thorough article which is superbly illustrated and composed in a compelling prose. I have a few very minor comments you can consider or discard, at your leisure.

The article is 14,819 characters; the manual of style (MOS:LEADLENGTH) advises a lead of "One or two paragraphs" for articles of this length. However, it's so close I think you should just keep the lead as it is.
I feel like at some point the Baltic Sea could be wikilinked.
- Good point.
I feel like adding the literal translation (President of the Realm) after Reichspräsident is a bit clunky.
- Yeah, it's not great - do you have a better idea? Parsecboy (talk) 21:02, 19 November 2018 (UTC)[reply]

Chetsford (talk) 06:06, 29 October 2018 (UTC)[reply]

Comments by AustralianRupert

Support: G'day, Parsec, nice work. I have a few minor suggestions, but otherwise it looks good to me: AustralianRupert (talk) 07:27, 11 November 2018 (UTC)[reply]

in the lead, was the fifth of five --> "last of five"?
- Agree that that's better
in the lead, She was laid down in 1902, was launched in May 1904, and was commissioned in May 1906 --> "She was laid down in December 1902, was launched in May 1904, and was commissioned in May 1906"?
- Added
in the lead, Hessen's peacetime career centered --> Lothringen's?
- Fixed
in the infobox, "December 1902" (as the laid down date) does not appear in the body
- Added the full date to both
in the infobox, "16,000 ihp (12,000 kW)" compared with "15,781 ihp; 11,768 kW" in the body
- Fixed
the launching speed --> "speech"?
- Funny what the fingers type sometimes, eh?
Prince Heinrich had --> wikilink name on first mention
- Done
same as above for "Wilhelm II"
- Done
island of Helgoland --> move link to the first mention of Helgoland
- Done
KAdm: has this abbreviation been formally introduced?
- Fixed
same as above for "VAdm"
- Fixed. Thanks for reviewing the article. Parsecboy (talk) 21:08, 19 November 2018 (UTC)[reply]
  - No worries, I have added my support now. Thanks for your efforts. Regards, AustralianRupert (talk) 02:13, 20 November 2018 (UTC)[reply]

Support Comments by Sturmvogel_66

In the infobox, how many torpedo tubes?
- Good catch
And what kind of length and displacement?
- Added
conversions for metric horsepower differ between the infobox and main body
- Fixed
Give a translation of Vizeadmiral on first use
- Good catch
What kind of machinery spaces?
- Clarified
Link minefield, reserve, capital ship, Kiel, Kiel Canal in the infobox photo, battlecruiser,
- Done all but "reserve" - what would you link that to? Military reserve force seems to be the closest option, but it doesn't really apply either.
Multiple conversions of 28 cm
- Removed one
The fleet conducted training exercises in the Baltic in February 1908. Prince Heinrich had pressed for such a cruise the previous year, arguing that it would prepare the fleet for overseas operations and would break up the monotony of training in German waters, though tensions with Britain over the developing Anglo-German naval arms race were high. The fleet departed Kiel on 17 July, passed through the Kaiser Wilhelm Canal to the North Sea, and continued to the Atlantic. The fleet returned to Germany on 13 August. How do the first and second sentences connect?
- There was a missing line that introduced the cruise - not sure how I left that out
the German navy could then Capitalize navy
- Done
Why was her armor not sold?--Sturmvogel 66 (talk) 02:02, 26 November 2018 (UTC)[reply]
- It's not clear - presumably to use it for weapons tests or something, but I haven't seen anything specific. Parsecboy (talk) 13:53, 7 December 2018 (UTC)[reply]

Source review

The sources used are high-quality ones.
Use |lastauthoramp=y in the cite book template to force an ampersand to match the format of your cites.
- Done
Otherwise all good.--Sturmvogel 66 (talk) 02:04, 26 November 2018 (UTC)[reply]
- Thanks Sturm. Parsecboy (talk) 13:53, 7 December 2018 (UTC)[reply]

The discussion above is closed. Please do not modify it. Subsequent comments should be made on the appropriate discussion page. No further edits should be made to this discussion.