Talk:Beauty Revealed/GA1

Latest comment: 10 years ago by J Milburn in topic GA Review

GA Review

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Reviewer: J Milburn (talk · contribs) 14:46, 5 October 2014 (UTC)Reply


This is a great article on a surprisingly interesting topic. I only have a few small comments.

  • "Writing in Antiques in 2012, Randall L. Holton and Charles A. Gilday said that" There's a tense shift, here.
  • "The art critic Chris Packard" Same as above
  • "As opposed to the "burdened" 1845 self-portrait and the non-eroticized one of 1832" Worth linking/including in the article?
  • It's not a traditional one, but if I were in your shoes, I'd cite the Common-place pieces as journal article with no page numbers. There's a volume and an issue number, and the journal has an ISSN number, so...

Other than the above point, the sources look excellent. The images are great, the prose is generally excellent, the research is solid... A very nice article. J Milburn (talk) 14:46, 5 October 2014 (UTC)Reply

Some category thoughts:

Ok, great- I'll go ahead and promote once you've rephrased that tense-shifty sentence. I've fiddled a bit further with the categories, which are looking about right now. J Milburn (talk) 16:22, 5 October 2014 (UTC)Reply

There is still one significant problem with the article. These two sentences are virtually identical:

  • "Although Goodridge was forty years old when she completed Beauty Revealed, the breasts depicted appear younger, imbued with a 'balance, paleness, and buoyancy' by the harmony of light, color, and balance."
  • "Although Goodridge was aged forty when she painted this miniature, her breasts are depicted as young ones, with 'balance, paleness, and buoyancy', imbued in part by the harmony of light, color, and balance."

The sentences in the lead should summarize the body text, not repeat it. Kaldari (talk) 03:31, 7 October 2014 (UTC)Reply

I'm also not sure that sentence really belongs in the Description section, especially the second half of it. It would probably be more appropriate in the Analysis section. Kaldari (talk) 03:42, 7 October 2014 (UTC)Reply
  • Reworded, but it's a key point so I'm averse to losing it entirely in the lead. I've attributed to Packard in the body, and although I can see the argument for including it in the Analysis section below, I'm not too sure it belongs there - the paragraph discussing Packard's views is not quite on the same subject. If J. agrees with you, though, I'll be happy to try and rework it. — Crisco 1492 (talk) 04:00, 7 October 2014 (UTC)Reply
  • I agree that there is a difficulty in finding a line between description and analysis; I thought Chris's judgement was reasonable, even if I may have chosen differently. If I was writing the article, I think the fact that the breasts appear young would go in the description section, while the quote would go in analysis. (I said off-wiki that I'm going to hold off promoting while there are discussions ongoing- if the editing back and forth continues, the review may need to be closed.) J Milburn (talk) 18:59, 7 October 2014 (UTC)Reply

I'm now going to go ahead and promote. The article appears stable, as the discussion has died down, and the outstanding substantive criticism is baseless- until a reliable source can be found challenging the academic consensus that Goodridge painted this as a particular kind of self-portrait, this conjecture does not belong in the article. Other than that, the article has been looked at by a number of capable editors, all of whom have offered small improvements. I'm confident that the article looks roughly as it should, and comfortably meets the GA criteria. J Milburn (talk) 14:58, 12 October 2014 (UTC)Reply