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Talk:Blackwyche/GA1

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Latest comment: 9 years ago by Juhachi in topic GA Review

GA Review

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Latest comment: 9 years ago26 comments2 people in discussion
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Reviewer: Juhachi (talk · contribs) 22:19, 15 September 2015 (UTC)Reply

GA review – see WP:WIAGA for criteria

  1. Is it reasonably well written?
    A. Prose is "clear and concise", without copyvios, or spelling and grammar errors:  
    B. MoS compliance for lead, layout, words to watch, fiction, and lists:  
  2. Is it factually accurate and verifiable?
    A. Has an appropriate reference section:  
    B. Cites reliable sources, where necessary:  
    C. No original research:  
  3. Is it broad in its coverage?
    A. Major aspects:  
    B. Focused (see summary style):  
  4. Is it neutral?
    Fair representation without bias:  
  5. Is it stable?
    No edit wars, etc:  
  6. Does it contain images to illustrate the topic?
    A. Images are tagged with their copyright status, and valid fair use rationales are provided for non-free content:  
    B. Images are provided if possible and are relevant to the topic, and have suitable captions:  
  7. Overall:
    Pass or Fail:  


Infobox
  • The image caption says "Commodore 64 cover art", but seeing as how the game does not appear to have been released for any other system, it should probably just be "Cover art".
Lead
  • "runs from Ultimate's Filmation engine which was previously" -- place a comma between engine and which
  • "The game's setting and graphics was heavily inspired" --> The game's setting and graphics were heavily inspired
  • "It was by followed a final instalment" --> It was followed by a final installment
Gameplay
  • "and is set on board a haunted galleon" -- You used galley in the lead and now use galleon here; please stick with one or the other for consistency.
  • "and a magic sword in order to" --> and a magic sword to
  • "The player begins the game with full energy and will slowly deplete every time the player is hit by an enemy." -- This sentence is confusing. I think instead of "slowly" you meant something like "slightly", since slowly implies that it is an ongoing action. If so, the sentence should read something like, "The player begins the game with full energy, which will decrease slightly every time the player is hit by an enemy."
  • "which once all segments are picked up will form a complete view of the game's overworld." --> which will form a complete view of the game's overworld once all the segments are picked up.
Development
  • "The company were known for their reluctance" --> The company was known for their reluctance
  • "one team would work on graphics whilst the other would" --> one team would work on graphics, while the other would
  • "despite the limitations platforms such as the ZX Spectrum and Commodore 64 offered" -- I would rewrite this sentence to something like "despite the limitations with platforms such as the ZX Spectrum and Commodore 64."
  • "£5000" --> {{GBP|5,000|link=yes}}
  • Does Calisto Software need to be linked?
  • He later began working for the company in producing video games however he quit due to the strain of his daily 68 miles (109 km) commute." --> "Although he began working for Calisto Software in producing video games, he later quit due to the strain of his daily, {{convert|68|mi|abbr=on}} commute."
  • "The graphics of the game were designed by Bob Thomas whereas the code was written by Dave Thomas." -- Place a comma between Thomas and whereas.
  • "once a game was complete it would be sent to" -- Place a comma between complete and it.
Reception
  • "stated that he had trouble which section of the game he was on due to the similarities of all colours" --> stated that he had trouble determining which section of the game he was on due to the similarities of all the colours".
  • "stating the sprites to be "awful", animation as "crummy" with little or no range of colouring." --> stating the sprites to be "awful", and animation as "crummy" with little or no range of colouring.
  • "Harding opinionated the game to be "miles better" than its predecessor whereas Cooke" -- Place a comma between predecessor and whereas.
References
  • Change the accessdate in ref 6 to the dmy format used in the rest of the article.
Additional comments

Overall, it's a pretty well written article, and once the changes above have been implemented, I believe it'll be ready for GA.--十八 22:19, 15 September 2015 (UTC)Reply

@Juhachi: thank you for the review! I think I've addressed everything, if you can take a look? "Instalment" is British spelling and I've updated the gameplay screenshot's FUR. Which reminds me, I should get updating the rest that I have uploaded. This was a fun article to write about, seeing as there was a lot of information on development. JAGUAR  14:28, 16 September 2015 (UTC)Reply
Good work, but the FUR update was for the infobox image, not the screenshot, and you can only use {{Non-free use rationale video game cover}} for box/cover art. I've seen screenshots use {{Non-free use rationale}} or {{Non-free use rationale 2}} like you had before. I just went ahead and did them both, but look out for this in the future. I believe that's everything, so I'll pass this for GA.--十八 20:15, 16 September 2015 (UTC)Reply
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