Talk:CSS Beaufort/GA1

Latest comment: 1 year ago by Hog Farm in topic GA Review

GA Review

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The following discussion is closed. Please do not modify it. Subsequent comments should be made on the appropriate discussion page. No further edits should be made to this discussion.


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Reviewer: Premeditated Chaos (talk · contribs) 23:59, 20 August 2023 (UTC)Reply

Dibsing ♠PMC(talk) 23:59, 20 August 2023 (UTC)Reply

  • CSS Baltic has a footnote explaining CSS, not sure if you want to do one here
    • I don't know that that's necessary. The Baltic one was the result of a request by a single user, there hasn't really been indications otherwise that this is considered needed or even useful
  • American Civil War. Launched at Wilmington, Delaware, is a bit of a blue sea, do we ned the ship launching link? (Alternately, you could reword to something like "Originally launched as Caledonia at Wilmington...bla bla" but I leave it to you)
    • Have rephrased along the lines of this
  • "James Catchart Johnston" out of curiosity is he anyone that matters? It's ok if he isn't
  • Nice crisp lead, I get the feeling you've written one or two of these :P
  • "cannons the ships were armed with had a tendency to explode" they're supposed to do that, right?
  • I assume, since I don't think you mention it, that we don't know the origin of Beaufort as a name
  • Might be worth putting a date for Oregon Inlet, for the unwashed masses like me who don't reflexively know when particular engagements in the Civil War started :)
    • Added; I had meant to include the date but apparently forgot
  • Not sure we need to repeat that Beaufort was in service to North Carolina, but I'm not sprinting to remove it if you think it's needed
    • Have removed that; I'd put that text in there before I had found the passage in Trotter that referenced the date of the transfer
  • Caption for the Roanoke Island map could mention a creation date - I assume it's contemporary to the battle?
    • 1862, have added. The creator was probably a participant in the battle
  • No other prose complaints through "North Carolina"
  • "Hampton Roads" opens with "...James River Squadron. The squadron...", which is somewhat inharmonious. To avoid repeating squadron so soon, you could start the next sentence with "Led by the ironclad CSS Virginia, the squadron etc etc"
    • Have rephrased as suggested
  • Under "End of war", the link to Battle of Chaffin's Farm is a bit of an Easter Egg
    • Have rephrased, hopefully this is resolved now
  • Honestly, I'm struggling to even find anything to nitpick here, I have no other comments through the remainder of the prose
  • Sourcing is reliable, spot checks on the books I could access (thanks, IA!) didn't come up with anything. No CV/close para concerns.
  • Image use is appropriate and free (the pic of the Henry has a drily smug caption that I really enjoyed)

I'm going to pass this straight out; I can't see a reason not to. Treat the above comments as suggestions, since they really very much are nitpicks. ♠PMC(talk) 09:12, 23 August 2023 (UTC)]Reply

Thank you very much for the review! I found your comments quite helpful. Hog Farm Talk 00:53, 24 August 2023 (UTC)Reply
The discussion above is closed. Please do not modify it. Subsequent comments should be made on the appropriate discussion page. No further edits should be made to this discussion.