Talk:HSwMS Niord/GA1

Latest comment: 6 months ago by Pickersgill-Cunliffe in topic GA Review

GA Review

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Nominator: Simongraham (talk · contribs)

Reviewer: Pickersgill-Cunliffe (talk · contribs) 12:53, 30 March 2024 (UTC)Reply

I'll take a look at this shortly. Pickersgill-Cunliffe (talk) 12:53, 30 March 2024 (UTC)Reply

Prelim

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  • Long tons and nautical miles are duplicated links
    • Removed.
  • File:HMS Niord.jpg has no US PD and not currently sure about the existing Swedish rationale as no publishing date is provided for the "published anonymously before 1 January 1954" rationale.
    • Updated the source and licenses.
  • Article is stable
  • Earwig reports copyvio unlikely

Lede and infobox

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  • First class needs a hyphen
    • Added.
  • "However, this service did not last long." I would consider 4-5 years of service to be enough that this sentence isn't needed
    • Removed.
  • Main text could more explicitly explain the namesake (to avoid needing an infobox citation)
    • Added.
  • Should the infobox have the design speed instead of the trials speed?
    • Good point. Changed.
  • Complement differs between infobox and main text
    • Oops. Amended.

Design and development

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  • Why/how was Oden successful? First sentence of the first paragraph is tipping the reader straight into the deep end!
    • Clarified.
  • A word on what makes a ship "first-class"?
    • Added.
  • "After reconstruction" give the year here
    • Added.
  • Link bow
    • Added.
  • Link nickel-steel
    • Added.
  • Suggest moving the searchlight mention to the end of the third paragraph, seems awkward coming after unrelated armour explanation
    • Moved.

Construction and career

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  • Sentence beginning "On 20 February 1904..." has two "in response"s which is awkward reading
    • Reworded.
  • Day Bosanquet was a knight (1905)
    • Added.
  • Do we know where she was based during her service? Which parts of the coast, or which port?
    • Unfortunately, the sources do not give any more information than I have given.
  • "out of the front-line service"
    • Removed.
  • "and finally to be an exhibit" something missing here
    • Clarified.

References

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  • References look good. AGF for print sources.
@Simongraham: Hi, apologies for the delay (my work is making these more common than they should be!), that's all I have for now. Not sure if Sturmvogel 66 might want to be involved as well? Pickersgill-Cunliffe (talk) 17:17, 15 April 2024 (UTC)Reply
@Pickersgill-Cunliffe: Not a problem. Very kindly, Sturmvogel 66 has already had a look through and provided very helpful suggestions, which have already been acted on. Please look at my comments above. I believe all the changes you request are done. simongraham (talk) 17:42, 16 April 2024 (UTC)Reply
@Simongraham: Passing this article as satisfying the GA criteria. Pickersgill-Cunliffe (talk) 17:49, 16 April 2024 (UTC)Reply