Talk:History of Sega

GA Review

This review is transcluded from Talk:History of Sega/GA2. The edit link for this section can be used to add comments to the review.

Reviewer: Sjones23 (talk · contribs) 06:18, 7 May 2019 (UTC)

GA review (see here for what the criteria are, and here for what they are not)

1. It is reasonably well written.

   a (prose, spelling, and grammar): b (MoS for lead, layout, word choice, fiction, and lists):

   A good rule of thumb is that the lead is to be 3 to 4 paragraphs per WP:LEAD since the article has over 50,000 characters.

2. It is factually accurate and verifiable.

   a (reference section): b (citations to reliable sources): c (OR): d (copyvio and plagiarism):

   See my comments below.

3. It is broad in its coverage.

   a (major aspects): b (focused):

4. It follows the neutral point of view policy.

   Fair representation without bias:

5. It is stable.

   No edit wars, etc.:

6. It is illustrated by images and other media, where possible and appropriate.

   a (images are tagged and non-free content have fair use rationales): b (appropriate use with suitable captions):

   y

7. Overall:

   Pass/Fail:

Discussion

For criteria 2b and 2c, I'll look into detecting any copyvio problems, all dead citations must be archived or replaced and all live citations have archives in case they go dead. Other than that, there aren't any problems. Any thoughts? Lord Sjones23 (talk - contributions) 06:40, 7 May 2019 (UTC)

@Sjones23: You have a fair point on the lead; I'll look at expanding it today. Citations should all be archived; to be sure I ran the IAManagement Bot through it again and looked for missing items. Red Phoenix ^talk 11:24, 7 May 2019 (UTC)

Sjones23 As requested, I have expanded the lead. Red Phoenix ^talk 19:03, 7 May 2019 (UTC)

Good work. If there's no further objections or concerns, I'll go ahead and pass it. Lord Sjones23 (talk - contributions) 19:08, 7 May 2019 (UTC)

No copyvio problems detected on my end. This article is now good to go. Lord Sjones23 (talk - contributions) 01:32, 8 May 2019 (UTC)

Lead

Without wanting to piss on the GA party (congrats to all involved)...

The opening paragraph in the lead is kind of a mess. It seems to imply three different origins to the company ("spans from 1960", "roots back to Standard Games in 1940", "traced back to the founding of Nihon Goraku Bussan") and uses repetitive language ("roots back", "traced back to"). I get no clear sense here about how the company began. Can it be simplified? Popcornduff (talk) 04:10, 8 May 2019 (UTC)

I agree it can be simplified within the recommended three to four paragraphs per WP:LEAD. Lord Sjones23 (talk - contributions) 04:33, 8 May 2019 (UTC)

The Service Games Complex

While this article generally does a good job of digging into the complexities of Sega's early history, it is missing one crucial element. Anyone reading this article would assume that Service Games was a purely Japanese company established by Americans. While this is narrowly true of Service Games Japan, the article omits that this Service Games was merely a subsidiary of a parent company also called Service Games headquartered in Panama that also controlled subsidiaries in Las Vegas, South Korea, and West Germany. This coin-operated distribution empire supplied product to American military bases across the world, not just in Japan or the Far East. Service Games in Panama was later dissolved and superseded by its subsidiary, Club Speciality Overseas (CSOI), which was also based in Panama and assumed control of the Service Games complex. Even after the G&W purchase of Sega Enterprises, CSOI remained the exclusive worldwide agent for Sega products for several more years. Indrian (talk) 21:20, 13 May 2019 (UTC)

Interesting; the main source I used for this was the Horowitz book and he mentions the Panama company but only briefly. He’s been known to have a couple of factual errors before... i.e. he didn’t go into much detail about Utamatic, ergo your edits today. That being said, I never saw anything about CSOI. I’d love to dig into this further and probably will to get this right, but give me some time as it’s a busy week, and my focus is on a Sega FA run and Sega Genesis TFA ahead of this, though this article intertwined with both. Indrian, thanks for the lead for more research! Red Phoenix ^talk 00:21, 14 May 2019 (UTC)

No worries. Feel free to take your time. I should say that "subsidiary" is not really the right word because all of the companies in the complex were technically independent, but the Panama corporation was the worldwide clearing house for all these import-export activities. The motherlode for most of this information is a tax case against Martin Bromley that is available online. Additional information, particularly on CSOI, comes from the records of a 1971 Congressional investigation into Sega's activities in South Vietnam, where the company was alleged to have cornered the slot machine trade through bribery and intimidation. Indrian (talk) 00:35, 14 May 2019 (UTC)

The year Service Games, Hawaii was founded

Hello, I recently found out the exact time and date Service Games was founded in Hawaii. I gave this information to the guys at Sega Retro and they are using these links as their sources: https://archive.fo/h3dCN https://segaretro.org/File:TheHonoluluAdvertiser_US_1946-12-28_page_12.png

I thought this information could be useful to you guys as well. — Preceding unsigned comment added by Konim96 (talk • contribs) 11:32, 14 August 2019 (UTC)

Jewishness

why is it relevant that in 1940 a predecessor company was founded by a "Jewish-American" businessman? Or that his son changed his name from Bromberg to Bromley? What does being Jewish or changing a name have to do with anything else in this article. I don't see anything, which calls into question the motives for this edit. I think those pieces of irrelevant info should be removed as they merely suggest stereotyping/denigrating individuals for their religion. 50.229.60.142 (talk) 19:17, 18 September 2023 (UTC)

• Removed. Not really relevant, I concur. Red Phoenix ^talk 01:54, 22 September 2023 (UTC)