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Talk:Hurricane Jose (1999)/GA1

< Talk:Hurricane Jose (1999)
Latest comment: 11 years ago by TropicalAnalystwx13 in topic GA Review

GA Review

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Latest comment: 11 years ago30 comments2 people in discussion
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Reviewer: TropicalAnalystwx13 (talk · contribs) 23:12, 12 January 2013 (UTC)Reply

  • "The depression strengthened and by October 18, it was upgraded to Tropical Storm Jose" – This sentence is worded weird to me. How about, "The depression intensified and was subsequently upgraded to Tropical Storm Jose on October 18."?
  • "The storm tracked northwestward and while approaching the Leeward Islands, it was upgraded to a hurricane on the following day." – Same as above comment...seems worded weird. Suggestion..."The storm tracked northwestward and was upgraded to a hurricane the following day as it approached the northern Leeward Islands."
  • "With winds of 100 mph (155 km/h) Category 2" – Strange wording there. Also, 100 mph is one of those special situations where the Wikipedia convert template gives a value other than what it is. 100 mph should be 160 km/h as is used by the NHC.
  • "Further deterioration occurred and Jose had been reduced to a tropical storm before landfall in Tortola on October 21." – "had been reduced" to "weakened"?
  • "However, on the following day, wind shear increased again, while sea surface temperatures were decreasing, causing Jose to weaken and quickly transition into an extratropical cyclone." – This sentence needs parallelism. Keep it present or past tense, but not both.
  • "A combination of hurricane force winds and flooding in Antigua and Barbuda destroyed at least 500 homes, left 90% of homes without electricity and another 50% experiencing disrupted telephone service, and caused 12 injuries and one fatality" – Run-on sentence.
  • "Dvorak satellite classifications began at 1200 UTC on October 17, and six hours later, the system developed into Tropical Depression Fourteen while located about 700 miles (1,100 km) east of the Windward Islands." – Link Dvorak satellite classifications.
  • "The upgrade was due to impressive appearance on satellite imagery, mostly outflow and banding features, as well as satellite intensity estimates of winds reaching 40 mph (65 km/h)." – Not sure if this sentence is needed. If you want to keep it, though, reword it.
  • "Because there was no "immediately identifiable hindrances to further strengthening", intensity forecasts indicated Jose reaching hurricane status by late on October 19." – English teachers say, "Never start a sentence with "Because"".
  • "Later that day, three computer models predicted that the anticyclone over Jose would move west-northwestward, causing the storm to potential strengthen to a major hurricane." – Potential to potentially.
  • "Although atmospheric conditions previously seemed favorable for further significant strengthening, water vapor imagery indicated that an upper-trough was extending from the western Caribbean Sea to the eastern Bahamas, this in turn induced wind shear on Jose." – The comma after "Bahamas" should be a semicolon.
  • "However, Jose instead continued to weaken [10] and was only a tropical storm when it made landfall in Tortola at 1105 UTC on October 21." – Reference is not positioned correctly.
  • "Around that time, the overall cloud pattern was "not impressive", though a large cluster of deep convection still has cloud tops with temperatures of −121 °F (−85 °C)." – Sentence does not have parallelism. Probably is not needed [the sentence] anyways.
  • "Later on October 23, no further reconnaissance aircraft flights occurred, causing the National Hurricane Center to rely on satellite intensity estimates and surface observations." – Another unneeded sentence.
  • "Despite this, the National Hurricane Center noted that "the deep convection is poorly organized enough that strengthening is unlikely before extratropical transition in 36 hours". – Period goes inside the quote, and the sentence needs a comma after "noted that".
  • "By 1200 UTC on October 24, the storm once again reached hurricane intensity. Shortly thereafter, Jose passed about 300 miles (480 km) east of Bermuda." --> "By 1200 UTC on October 24, the storm once again attained hurricane intensity as it passed several hundred miles east of Bermuda."
  • "Around then, the tropical storm watch that was issued for Trinidad and Tobago was discontinued." – "Around then" is very vague.
  • "The Governor of the United States Virgin Islands Charles Wesley Turnbull issued a curfew effective at 6 p.m. AST on October 20" – Comma right before "Charles" and comma right after "Turnbull".
  • "At another location, wind gusts reached 100 mph (160 km/h) and precipitation amounts up to 15 inches (380 mm)" – What location?
  • "...only to be surpassed by Hurricane Lenny about a month later." – No need for original research.
  • "Across the island, the storm killed one person, injured 12, left an elderly blind man missing, and 500 houses were destroyed including a newly built church." – Parallelism again. "Across the island, the storm killed one person, injured twelve, left an elderly blind man missing..." (was he found?) "...and destroyed 500 hours, including a newly-built church.".
  • "In Puerto Rico, especially the eastern side of the island, some areas experienced tropical storm force winds." – More strange wording.
  • "In the United States Virgin Islands, tropical storm force winds were measured at a few locations." – More vague wording.
  • Make sure all values are rounded to the nearest five.
  • Link all terms not known a layman, on their first instance.
  • St. Vincent is a dablink.
  • The External Links "Irish Examiner" and "Associated Press" are dead.

On hold until these issues are fixed. TropicalAnalystwx13 (talk) 23:12, 12 January 2013 (UTC)Reply

Everything is good now. Passed the article. TropicalAnalystwx13 (talk) 04:04, 13 January 2013 (UTC)Reply
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