Talk:Neon Gravestones/GA2

GA Review

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Reviewer: Kyle Peake (talk · contribs) Kyle Peake (talk) 06:46, 16 November 2019 (UTC)

Good Article review progress box

Criteria: 1a. prose () 1b. MoS () 2a. ref layout () 2b. cites WP:RS () 2c. no WP:OR () 2d. no WP:CV () 3a. broadness () 3b. focus () 4. neutral () 5. stable () 6a. free or tagged images () 6b. pics relevant () Note: this represents where the article stands relative to the Good Article criteria. Criteria marked are unassessed

Infobox and lead

• Add release date to infobox; album's release date as this was not an independent release
• "is a song written and recorded by" → "is a song by" as it was obviously recorded by them and the writers are mentioned later in the lead
• Add release year of Trench in brackets
• Target hip hop to Hip hop music
• "the song attracted moderate media attention" → ""Neon Gravestones" attracted moderate media attention" as it is a new para in lead
• "Nevertheless, it received" → "Nevertheless, the song received" as it is used most recently before this
• "The track is part of the" → "It is part of the"

 All done

Background

• Img needs alt text
• "during the songwriting process, in order" → "during the songwriting process; this was in order" as there's too many "," and this works in prose
• "In an interview" → "In a October 2018 interview" as you state "Joseph later told" in the section so it should be known when the earlier was
• "Tyler Joseph revealed" → "Joseph revealed" as Tyler Joseph is his real name
• "in the middle of the album" → "in the middle of Trench" as you state "the album" twice in the sentence so improve prose
• "the heart of Trench" italicize the album's title
• "He was also worried" → "Joseph was also worried"
• "in regard to spiritual or political things" → "in regard to spiritual or political subjects" as this is more encyclopedic
• "the reasons they made" → "the reasons that they made"
• "and more of a challenge."[6]" → "and more of a challenge".[6]" for quotes consistency
• "he said that he feared" → "Joseph said that he feared"

 All done except point 9 where I changed it to "why", since I thought that made more sense.

Composition and lyrics

• "the song "Neon Gravestone," a" → "the song "Neon Gravestone", a" as you don't place , inside speech marks for songs (this is on audio caption)
• "The song, described" → ""Neon Gravestones", described" as you haven't mentioned the title for a while
• "Lyrically, it attacks" → "Lyrically, the song attacks"
• "Tyler Joseph explained" → "Joseph explained"
• ""the importance of the topic."[15]" → ""the importance of the topic".[15]"
• "feels like I have to leave."[6]" → "feels like I have to leave".[6]"
• "Joseph writes that" are you sure this is correct prose?
• "and that "we" → "and "we"
• "have described this ending" → "have described the ending"
• "as directly linked to the album's penultimate track" → "as directly linked to Trench's penultimate track"
• "a track which pays homage" → "which pays homage"
• Release date for Vessel in brackets

 All done (for your seventh point I changed "writes" to "raps", but I'm not quite sure if I'm meant to do anything more here).

Critical reception

• "by music critics" → "from music critics"
• "who saw the band as glamorizing" → "who saw them as glamorizing"
• "says the song" → "said the song"
• "NME's" → "NME's"
• "off the album" → "off Trench"
• WikiLink PopMatters
• "hailing it as" → "hailing the song as"
• "a troubling time."[22]" → "a troubling time".[22]"
• "more critical of the song regarding" → "more critical of "Neon Gravestones" regarding"
• "remember be cruel?" and that" → "remember be cruel"? He continued, writing that"
• "those left behind."[7]" → "those left behind".[7]"
• "was one of the most controversial songs of their career" → "was one of the most controversial of their career"
• WikiLink Variety
• "in the months to come."[13]" → "in the months to come".[13]"
• "does not get glorified'."[17]" → "does not get glorified'".[17]"

 All done

Credits and personnel

• Good

Charts

• Good

References

• Archive them all with fix dead links

Will get that done as soon as I have time later today

Done this myself as it's only one button

• WikiLink Kerrang! on ref 1

 Done

• Are you sure PressReader is reliable?

I think that since it is publishing an article from Kerrang!, which is reliable, it can be used in this case, since PressReader doesn't edit the articles as far as I know, and I couldn't find anything in terms of Wikipedia policy that prevented its use.

• Ref 9 needs YouTube as publisher, and accessdate; fix format

 Done

• WikiLink Dork Magazine on ref 15

 Done

• Fix ref 23, similarly to ref 9

 Done

• Refs 1, 6 and 7 are too high on Copyvio, gotta be fixed

 Done

Final comments and verdict

 On hold for now, hope you can respond to all of my comments! --Kyle Peake (talk) 16:54, 18 November 2019 (UTC)

Kyle Peake, this review came a little quicker than I expected. May I have an extension until next Friday? This weekend starts my university's Thanksgiving break, and I had another commitment that I was hoping to return to today and Thursday. dannymusiceditor ^oops 17:13, 19 November 2019 (UTC)

@DannyMusicEditor: That's fine, though it is common to leave articles on hold for 7 days, I will extend due to your personal life as this cannot be helped. --Kyle Peake (talk) 17:18, 19 November 2019 (UTC)

@DannyMusicEditor and Kyle Peake: If you like, I can take over from DannyMusicEditor until Friday while he completes his other review. I've written about 85% of the page and know its contents pretty well. mike•owen ^discuss 18:27, 19 November 2019 (UTC)

@MikeOwen: As the reviewer, I am willing to let you take this on due to the experience and the nominator's schedule. Just respond to the issues and it'll all be good! --Kyle Peake (talk) 18:52, 19 November 2019 (UTC)

I'm actually completely ok with that. I nominated this in the first place because I wanted this to have a fair review unlike the last one. You can't fail an article if it's not failing any of the criteria, which is what the reviewer said in the last one. dannymusiceditor ^oops 19:25, 19 November 2019 (UTC)

✓ Pass, thanks for responding to the comments! --Kyle Peake (talk) 16:15, 20 November 2019 (UTC)