Talk:Seepapitso III/GA1
Latest comment: 4 days ago by Borsoka in topic GA Review
GA Review
editGA toolbox |
---|
Reviewing |
Article (edit | visual edit | history) · Article talk (edit | history) · Watch
Nominator: Thebiguglyalien (talk · contribs) 21:06, 3 December 2024 (UTC)
Reviewer: Borsoka (talk · contribs) 09:37, 6 December 2024 (UTC)
GA review – see WP:WIAGA for criteria
- Is it well written?
- A. The prose is clear and concise, and the spelling and grammar are correct:
- B. It complies with the manual of style guidelines for lead sections, layout, words to watch, fiction, and list incorporation:
- A. The prose is clear and concise, and the spelling and grammar are correct:
- Is it verifiable with no original research, as shown by a source spot-check?
- A. It contains a list of all references (sources of information), presented in accordance with the layout style guideline:
- B. Reliable sources are cited inline. All content that could reasonably be challenged, except for plot summaries and that which summarizes cited content elsewhere in the article, must be cited no later than the end of the paragraph (or line if the content is not in prose):
- C. It contains no original research:
- D. It contains no copyright violations nor plagiarism:
- A. It contains a list of all references (sources of information), presented in accordance with the layout style guideline:
- Is it broad in its coverage?
- A. It addresses the main aspects of the topic:
- B. It stays focused on the topic without going into unnecessary detail (see summary style):
- A. It addresses the main aspects of the topic:
- Is it neutral?
- It represents viewpoints fairly and without editorial bias, giving due weight to each:
- It represents viewpoints fairly and without editorial bias, giving due weight to each:
- Is it stable?
- It does not change significantly from day to day because of an ongoing edit war or content dispute:
- It does not change significantly from day to day because of an ongoing edit war or content dispute:
- Is it illustrated, if possible, by images?
- A. Images are tagged with their copyright status, and valid non-free use rationales are provided for non-free content:
- B. Images are relevant to the topic, and have suitable captions:
- A. Images are tagged with their copyright status, and valid non-free use rationales are provided for non-free content:
- Overall:
- Pass or Fail:
- Pass or Fail:
Comments
Explain kgosi with one or two words.- Added clarification in the lead.
Mention that Bangwaketse was in the British Protectorate of Bechuanaland in South Africa in the main text.- Reworded the body a little bit to explain this.
Introduce Sechele I.- Done.
...his brother... Why not "their brother"?- Because the article is about Seepapitso.
He also had two older half-siblings on his mother's side... Why not "They also had... on their mother's side..."?...his half-brother ... and his half-sister... Perhaps "a half-brother ... and a half-sister..."?- Done.
Introduce (with one or two words) Mothowagae Motlogelwa.- Done
I would write Lovedale Missionary Institution instead of Lovedale.- Done.
...as he trained... Perhaps "as he was trained"?- Done.
...the kgotla meetings I would rephrase to introduce the term.- Done.
His relationship with his brother soured... Why? I would name his brother.- Added the reason and the name.
...upon becoming kgosi... Delete.- Done.
...discouraged Moepitso from marrying his desired bride... Do we know why?- The source says the reasons are not known.
Perhaps this could be mentioned.
- I don't think it would benefit the article to add "but no one knows why" at the end. I did take a look at the source while thinking about this and added a detail about why it's relevant.
Dikgosi?- Plural of kgosi, this type of prefixing is standard in Bantu languages.
I would make it clear ("or chiefs")
- Done.
...all southern African leaders... I guess native/tribal/... leaders are mentioned here.- Clarified "tribal"
Among his assets was that... Delete.- Done.
I would introduce Pienaar as a South African general.- Done.
... Boers loyal to Germany... Were they German subject? If not, I would write that "Boers who had taken up arms against the British in ...." and linke Maritz rebellion.- Reworded to "pro-German", the source doesn't provide any context except that they were pro-German Boers.
Seepapitso was Christian... Could we name the denomination to which he adhered?- Done.
He was one of several dikgosi to protest the assimilation of the Bechuanaland Protectorate into the Union of South Africa, which had been a major issue during his father's reign The chronology is unclear for me.Borsoka (talk) 09:59, 6 December 2024 (UTC)- Clarified that it was a proposal.
..., which had been a major issue during his father's reign I would delete or rephrase it (", which had first/previosly/already... been a major issue during his father's reign")
- Done.
It has been speculated... By whom?- Attributed to the source.
Several headmen were deemed complicit in the killing and exiled.... By whom?- The source says the circumstances around this are unknown.
Seepapitso's death was felt widely through the Bangwaketse... I am not sure I understand.- The people were sad. Not sure what a better wording would be.
...as he was only eight years old... When?- Clarified.
I would radically shorten the last paragraph. We do not need to know all the regents' name. I think that regencies followed his reign, his reforms declined, and only when his sister assumed regency were his reforms renewed.Borsoka (talk) 11:38, 6 December 2024 (UTC)- Trimmed the details of the regencies that didn't pertain to Seepapitso's succession or reforms.
- In the lead, I would mention that some of his reforms, such a stricter system of tax collection, gave rise to dissatisfaction, or something similar.
- Not sure what part of the body this is referring to.
- In this case, the body should refer to it. :) "When it came to money, Seepapitso was strict. ... Seepapitso's method caused grievances, particularly among certain headmen..." [Molefi, Morton, Ngcongco (1987)] "To pay for the many projects he undertook, Seepapitso introduced many levies. .... Although Seepapitso was a good custodian of this money..., it is stated that the manner in which the money was collected caused grievances particularly among certain headmen." [Matemba (2002), p. 31]
- Borsoka Done.
Image review
- Could you add one or two more pictures and possibly a map? Borsoka (talk) 10:00, 6 December 2024 (UTC)
- Not sure what images or maps you have in mind here. This is the only existing image of Seepapitso that I know of.
- Perhaps a map? Borsoka (talk) 01:20, 8 December 2024 (UTC)
- I don't know what map you're suggesting, especially since the land under Seepapitso's jurisdiction was no different than many Ngwaketse dikgosi before and after him.
- I do not suggest any specific map. I only say a map of the region (if available) would be useful.
Borsoka, I've replied to the above. Thebiguglyalien (talk) 22:24, 7 December 2024 (UTC)
Source review
- All sources cited are high standard academic studies.
- Matemba (2002): ISSN is missing.
- Schapera (1963): a book identifier is missing.
- References 6a, 6b, 12a, 20, and 36 checked.
Reference 2b: ...in 1911 he implemented a law stipulating that citizens unable to pay taxes would "be sent away to work". Close paraphrasing? Furthermore, Massey refers to this case as an example of "abuses of chief authority".Borsoka (talk) 01:51, 8 December 2024 (UTC)- Reworded the non-quotation portion of the sentence. I have no objection if you want to dig around for identifiers and add them.