Talk:Women in Chile/Archive 1
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Archive 1 |
Rename
this article really needs to be renamed. 130.64.176.86 (talk) 20:45, 23 March 2009 (UTC)
- Agreed. This article is not just about rights. I'll move it to Women in Chile. Neelix (talk) 16:54, 17 April 2009 (UTC)
Article to look at for inspiration
Would be great to take some cues from Women in India. SarahStierch (talk) 06:17, 24 February 2012 (UTC)
Chile’s feminist anthem “The rapist is you,” went viral in 2019. The chant became an anthem for women during the social unrest of 2019, which was sparked by deepening inequality in the country. The song had a global impact, but the struggle for equality back in Chile continues https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=X8zv03IBCcA — Preceding unsigned comment added by 106.200.202.114 (talk) 20:06, 22 December 2020 (UTC)
Proposed Changes
I came across this page a few weeks ago and saw it was lacking in information and structure, but since then some other editors have drastically improved the page, which is great. I would still like to add even more information, though, specifically about
-Marriage and property rights for women in Chile (hopefully specifically saying what they are, and maybe what they have been in the past).
-Women's involvement in politics, since its only mention is Michelle Bachelet's presidency. How many women are in politics? Does society dislike many women being involved in politics? In the past there existed a Partido Femenino de Chile.
-Organizations for women's rights and empowerment, such as National Women's Service (SERNAM) and the Women's Study Center (Centro de Estudios de la Mujer). Also Chile's participation in international organizations that advocate better circumstances for women, like the United Nations and Chile's adoption of the Convention on the Elimination of All Forms of Discrimination Against Women.
-Women in the workforce (specifically mentioning informal and formal work done) and the income gap between men and women.
I also wish to add more links to the "See Also" section. Alissahart (talk) 21:41, 4 March 2012 (UTC)
- Those sound like good suggestions. Looking forward to seeing your additions. Kaldari (talk) 08:06, 8 March 2012 (UTC)
- Also the lead section at the top of the article definitely needs some expansion. It should be a 2-4 paragraph summary of the rest of the article. Kaldari (talk) 08:08, 8 March 2012 (UTC)
- I put up my changes Alissahart (talk) 16:39, 2 April 2012 (UTC)
- Looks good, except for the first sentence. Kaldari (talk) 21:22, 2 April 2012 (UTC)
- I had a hard time writing the lead. How do you think I could improve the first sentence? Should I just delete the first sentence and let the second sentence begin the page?Alissahart (talk) 21:51, 2 April 2012 (UTC)
- Hi Alissa! I think you could get away with (for lack of a better term) removing the first sentence. (As most situations for women around the world have "improved" depending on how you look at things!) When I write a lede, I often do a brief (very very brief) run through of what the article below entails. The first sentence could just be simple and sweet. An article I often refer to for influence about general women's overviews is Women in India. The opening line is a bit more elegant and still neutral, and true. Women's roles and lives have evolved in Chile, and IMHO it's fine to simply say so :) Not sure if this helps... Sarah (talk) 21:59, 2 April 2012 (UTC)
- I tried editing the first sentence some. Please feel free to make changes yourself if you have a great idea as to what it should be. :) Or let me know how I can improve it. Alissahart (talk) 03:29, 4 April 2012 (UTC)
- That's a great improvement Alissa :) Great work!! Sarah (talk) 04:08, 4 April 2012 (UTC)
- Yeah, this is a big improvement! Probably the only section that still needs work is the "Notable Chilean women" section. Otherwise, it looks like a complete article. Kaldari (talk) 04:38, 4 April 2012 (UTC)
- That's a great improvement Alissa :) Great work!! Sarah (talk) 04:08, 4 April 2012 (UTC)
- I tried editing the first sentence some. Please feel free to make changes yourself if you have a great idea as to what it should be. :) Or let me know how I can improve it. Alissahart (talk) 03:29, 4 April 2012 (UTC)
- Looks good, except for the first sentence. Kaldari (talk) 21:22, 2 April 2012 (UTC)
- I put up my changes Alissahart (talk) 16:39, 2 April 2012 (UTC)
Peer review
Overall, the article is concise, well written, and nicely covers the topic of Women in Chile. You have made great changes to the lead, which now effectively introduces the entry by expressing the overall topic of Women in Chile and conveying why it is significant. It is an appropriate length, according to the WP:LEAD. In the section on property you mention that unmarried men and women have equal rights, is there any other information on the subject that is worth noting in this section? Also you mention rural Chile, is there an urban Chile? If so, what are the property rights and inheritance practices of that region? Also, the “Suffrage” section is quite short, which does not convey the significance of the topic. Please consider expanding this section as well. In the “Employment” section you discuss the low participation rates of women in the work force, but then go on to state that women are increasingly moving out of unpaid work. It would be great to see some current statistics on the shift from unpaid to paid and/or informal work, particularly in the section on formal and informal work. Although the section on notable Chilean women concisely lists prominent women in the field of literature, politics, and religion, I think the section can be improved by expanding it to provide a little more background on the individuals listed. Alissahart, overall this is a great entry that appears to be well on its way to completion, great job! Nqogu (talk) 13:46, 10 April 2012 (UTC)
Peer Review 2
Overall this is a thorough and well-researched page with useful information. The sections on property and politics are especially useful and well-done. You definitely seem to have achieved your goals of improving these sections.
Some possible places for improvement follow:
Lead Section: It might be worth considering removing the first sentence altogether. It seems overly broad and the second sentence is stronger. Also, I think broadly explaining why this topic is distinct from “men in Chile” might be useful.
History of Women: Watch for passive voice or confusing wording in this section (ex. Change “economic resources to expand social welfare programs than had been done before” to “economic resources to expand social welfare programs than before).
I think the Gender Roles section could be made into its own section, as opposed to a sub-section of the History of women section. Additionally, I would considering removing the first sentence in the gender roles section altogether and instead adding more specific evidence such as what you provide when mentioning the UNDP report.
Legal Rights section: Are women’s legal rights opposed by any groups in particular? This might be interesting and important to add.
Marriage: The first sentence is a bit confusing it might be easier to understand if it said something like: “Until recently, women were legally barred from administering their own assets in marriage, but a new law has granted women asset control rights.” Or something like that.
Also, what exactly does household head mean here? Can you define?
Divorce: What is the “new Civil Marriage Law” not sure why it is important. Perhaps remove the phrase “at last” it seems a bit non-neutral.
Property: This section has good info, but may benefit from some restructuring to add more flow between paragraphs. It seems a bit choppy right now.
Family law: may be helpful to include a quick definition of a family allowance or link to a wikipage family allowance.
Politics Section General: This section may benefit from some restructuring. First, It may be good to begin with the info in the “female participation in politics” subsection and make this not a subsection but an intro to the section as a whole. Also, it may be good to make the pots and pans march a section on its own, it seems like a big enough deal. I might remove the “policy” section or try to incorporate it into other sections.
Politics/Michelle Bachelet’s Pres: I would move the sentence starting with “Unlike neighboring Argentina” through the sentence ending with “their own quotas” to the next section on female participation in politics. Currently it seems out of place a bit.
Policy: Typo in the sentence that begins with “Yet many” the sentence reads “by SERNAM our nongovernmental” it should be “by SERNAM OR nongovernmental.”
Rape: Might provide a wikilink to rape.
Sexual harassment: Perhaps remove the first sentence.
HIV/AIDS: The second sentence about societal beliefs and AIDS needs a citation or to be removed.
Peer Review 3
You did an awesome job improving this article. Your lead is very well done. I have a few suggestions for just areas you could expand on a little more.
-The informal and Formal work section could use a bit more information, possibly about the type of work that they do
-Under organizations, the international relations section seems a little out of place. Consider renaming that subsection international organizations or something of the like. Also this section needs more information to directly relate it to your topic.
--also maybe this section could be renamed. Organizations seems a bit broad. Perhaps the entire section should be named research and activism and then broken down.
-The section on rape needs more references. Again your work is really well done. Hope these comments help Bellechic (talk) 04:45, 11 April 2012 (UTC)
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References to flesh out divorce section and some general refs
Some references that could be used to flesh out the divorce section:
- The Effects of the Chilean Divorce Law on Women’s First Birth Decisions, an academic paper by a PhD candidate named Jose Gallegos.
- La violencia privada: Domestic violence in Chile, an article from the journal American Psychologist (I'll see if I can get access to it through my school's library).
- La compensación económica en el divorcio y la nulidad matrimonial, although that one could really only be understood well enough to be used in the article by a prolific Spanish speaker.
Some other articles I found that could be relevant to other parts of the article:
- Abortion Policies and Practices in Chile: Ambiguities and Dilemmas
- Religion and intimate partner violence in Chile: Macro- and micro-level influences, although this might drift more towards religion in Chile rather than women in Chile.
- The Rules of the Game: Feminist Policymaking in Chile, a paper by Liesl Haas.
Cheers, cymru.lass (talk • contribs) 09:16, 1 November 2013 (UTC)
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