- The following is an archived discussion of the DYK nomination of the article below. Please do not modify this page. Subsequent comments should be made on the appropriate discussion page (such as this nomination's talk page, the article's talk page or Wikipedia talk:Did you know), unless there is consensus to re-open the discussion at this page. No further edits should be made to this page.
The result was: promoted by Cwmhiraeth (talk) 05:59, 30 January 2017 (UTC)
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Jean Davies
edit... that Jean Davies, later Director of the Women's Royal Naval Service, attended Winston Churchill's 69th birthday party?Source: "Director, Women’s Royal Naval Service, 1961–64" (Who Was Who)- ALT1:
... that Jean Davies, then a junior officer in the Women's Royal Naval Service, attended Winston Churchill's 69th birthday party?Source: "Churchill's 69th birthday party with Stalin and Roosevelt in the British Assembly, which she attended" (Obituary in the The Times)
- ALT1:
Created by Gaia Octavia Agrippa (talk). Self-nominated at 05:13, 11 December 2016 (UTC).
New enough, long enough, and within policy. Hook clear and succinct, but could be more interesting. What's of interest here is a British woman serving in a male-dominated field at a time when patriarchy was much stronger. Not sure how to manifest that as a good hook here. Morganfitzp (talk) 22:01, 17 December 2016 (UTC)
- Sorry for the slow reply, it's Christmas! As a Brit the Churchill angle was most interesting. The female angle is quite hard to do, but how about this:
- ALT2:
... that Jean Davies was part of Churchill's delegation to the 1943 Quebec Conference and was, exceptionally for a woman, part of the ship's company of HMS Renown that transported them back to the UK?— Preceding unsigned comment added by Gaia Octavia Agrippa (talk • contribs) 00:55, 21 December 2016 (UTC)
- How about ALT3:
... that Jean Davies, of the Women's Royal Naval Service, accompanied Winston Churchill to the 1943 Quebec Conference and attended his 69th birthday party?Morganfitzp (talk) 23:42, 12 January 2017 (UTC)
- How about ALT3:
New reviewer needed to check the available hooks and see what is interesting and what is not (and also check that they're in the article and properly sourced). Thanks. BlueMoonset (talk) 20:52, 20 January 2017 (UTC)
This article is new enough and long enough. I prefer ALT1 (or ALT0) as the later hooks are too complex, and ALT3 make it sound as if Winston Churchill's birthday was during the Quebec Conference. The article is neutral and I detected no copyright issues. Cwmhiraeth (talk) 10:38, 25 January 2017 (UTC)
- @Cwmhiraeth: ALT0 and ALT1 are very uncomplicated, but they also don't convey the importance of the occasion. What do you think about adding from the source (which I also added to the article):
- ALT1a:
... that Jean Davies, then a junior officer in the Women's Royal Naval Service, attended Winston Churchill's 69th birthday party along with US President Franklin D. Roosevelt and Soviet Marshal Josef Stalin?Yoninah (talk) 21:21, 26 January 2017 (UTC)
- ALT1a is much more interesting and the hook facts are cited inline. I have struck the other hooks. Cwmhiraeth (talk) 06:09, 27 January 2017 (UTC)
- ALT1a is indeed significantly more interesting, but it's also 203 characters. Can I suggest that an ALT1b be proposed with 200 or fewer? There have to be ways to reduce the number of characters, including omitting Roosevelt's and Stalin's first names, or even the "US" or just the "D." in the Roosevelt section. Yoninah, any preference for ALT1b? BlueMoonset (talk) 18:19, 27 January 2017 (UTC)
- Sure.
- ALT1b: ... that Jean Davies, then a junior officer in the Women's Royal Naval Service, attended Winston Churchill's 69th birthday party along with President Franklin Roosevelt and Soviet Marshal Josef Stalin?
Good to go with ALT1b, definitely an improvement. Thanks! Mary Mark Ockerbloom (talk) 19:37, 29 January 2017 (UTC)
