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Template:Did you know nominations/Massaponax Baptist Church

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The following discussion is an archived discussion of the DYK nomination of the article below. Please do not modify this page. Subsequent comments should be made on the appropriate discussion page (such as this nomination's talk page, the article's talk page or Wikipedia talk:Did you know), unless there is consensus to re-open the discussion at this page. No further edits should be made to this page.

The result was: promoted by BlueMoonset (talk) 05:14, 14 June 2012 (UTC)

Massaponax Baptist Church

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General Grant's Council of War at Massaponax Baptist Church

  • Reviewed: John Hibbard
  • Comment: the hook seems a little 'clunky' - open to suggestions

Created/expanded by Wikipelli (talk). Self nom at 01:50, 6 June 2012 (UTC)

  • Length and age check. Topic notability and sourcing check. Hook sourcing checks. If you want to de-clunkify the hook, get rid of "Spotsy County". The one hold-up? — remove the stub designation. —  AjaxSmack  22:04, 9 June 2012 (UTC)
My problem really was with succinctly saying that the pews were brought outside from the church and I didn't think the hook said it well. But, I'm ok with
ALT 1:... that General Ulysses S. Grant held a council of war (pictured) with his top generals on pews taken outdoors from the Massaponax Baptist Church? Wikipelli Talk 22:38, 9 June 2012 (UTC)
Stub designation removed. —  AjaxSmack  23:11, 9 June 2012 (UTC)
  • I'm concerned that some of the phrasing in this article may be too close to that of its sources. Compare for example "The church was instructed to give letters of dismissal to all black members" with "the church was instructed to give letters of dismissal to all black members". Nikkimaria (talk) 02:04, 11 June 2012 (UTC)
    Wow... absolutely right! I recall trying to find out what a letter of dismissal was and forgot all about it. I've rewritten that line (and a couple of others). It should be good now. Please check again and let me know? Wikipelli Talk 02:22, 11 June 2012 (UTC)
    Much better, thanks. Nikkimaria (talk) 17:38, 11 June 2012 (UTC)
  • Restoring tick now that Nikkimaria's concerns have been addressed. BlueMoonset (talk) 17:41, 11 June 2012 (UTC)
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