Status-InCourt230

Hi My name is Lawrence Wirenkyi.

Im currently a university student and immersing myself into Writing for the Digital World. I find it amazing been able to edit articles responsibly and add factual information to further enhance an article. I love my sports and often catch myself spending a minimum of 8 hours a week watching sports such as NRL,NFL,Boxing,UFC and Soccer. I can't wait to tlak with fellow editors and receive constructive criticism as this will be my first time editing and broadening my skills as an editor.

Happy Editing :)

Editing of The road to Kokoda

Good evening Lawrence, welcome to Wikipedia. Good to see the expansion of Parer's works. Just a few notes as I go.

Your introduction above should go onto your User page rather than this Talk page (also with spaces after commas, and spelling mistakes corrected).

Always proof-read your work out aloud. (Where you put a sentence in brackets, then the full stop goes within.) Run words through the sphell chequer, (e.g. Papau). A paragraph contains a thought. You had two separate sentences on Parer, but not in the same paragraph.

You can see your work of 03 June 2021, and my changes of 23 June 2021. To see the changes side-by-side, see the difference page.

With The Road to Kokoda, you have gone overboard with bold. Bold suggests the bolded text is more important than any other text, so don't read the rest of the text.

Is a reader in Canada or Danmark given enough context, e.g. who is Damien PARER? Indicating he is a war photographer is helpful. The film is about the Kokoda track, but there was no link to this important connection. You use both the word 'track' and 'trail', so a need to be consistent. PNG did not become the PNG until 1975; so between 1949 and 1975, it would be correctly noted as Territory of Papua and New Guinea.

You cited several resources, for which at least one does not resolve.

Your impacts section is more about the Kokoda track, and not the film itself. It is making it hard to work out the relevance of two large paragraphs, and perhaps these should be deleted. For a movie called The road to Kokoda, you spend a lot of time mentioning Kokoda Front Line!; that causes me to wonder whether you have put the text in the wrong Wiki article – but I do not know the subject material to determine.– Q8682 (talk) 11:38, 23 June 2021 (UTC)

Correct tutor

Your tutor's user name is Carrolquadrio, not 'Carrol.quadrio'.