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Wikipedia:Peer review/IG Farben Building/archive1

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IG Farben Building

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This page has been greatly elongated by a translation of the German FA page of the same name de:IG-Farben-Haus. I'd be greatful for any suggestions regarding improving it's quality. The German page seems to be devoid of inline citations and the original article did not give any, however the online pages listed in the references section are quite comprehensive.--Mcginnly 22:56, 5 July 2006 (UTC)[reply]

  • Here are the things in the article, as of this edit that I see as needing fixing (or cleaning up) before becoming a featured article. Newnam(talk) 05:12, 6 July 2006 (UTC)[reply]
    1. The word 'vast' in the lead sentence is not necessary. IG Farben doesn't need it's whole German name in this article (it's mentioned in its own). IG Farben is singular and thus "was" rather than "were" should be used. IG Farben can better be described as a "conglomerate", rather than a "company" (in the last sentence of the lead paragraph). It should be mentioned after Frankfurt am Main that it is located in Germany, perhaps written as Frankfurt am Main, Germany
    2. The introduction (at 6 paragraphs) is too long. Too many specifics there now (ie, 2nd paragraph seems to much about IG Farben and not enough about the building, 3rd paragraph (except the part about it being the largest office building in the world at the time)) should be integrated below the headings.
    3. 4th Paragraph: Should be moved out of intro into a heading or merged into an existent header. First sentence written poorly (missing a "was" and the piece in parantheses needs to be reworked into the sentence. "Headquarters" doesn't need capitalization. What is the Army's V Corps (maybe a wikilink)? "General Creighton W. Abrams Building" should have quotes or italics, but not both. "U.S." doesn't have a space in it (this throught the whole article). The first "U.S." should be "United States" (without the quotes, but wikilinked). When referred to as "the building", "building" is not capitalized (also throughout the whole article).
    4. The picture Image:Goethe University Frankfurt Poelzig Building.jpeg is used twice. Image:Poelzigbau2.jpg also shows the same entrance as the other one and may or may not be considered redundant.
    5. What is "the I.G."? Is that referring to IG Farben, or something else? Are the periods supposed to seperate the letters (if so, why aren't there periods in IG Farben)?
    6. "Nüremburg Trials" should have a 'u' rather than a 'ü'. The 'ü' is only used in the German form, Nürnberg. Is there a wikilink for Federal German Government?
    7. In the 6th paragraph, wikilink € to Euro and remove the space to make it €25 instead of € 25. Universität should be replaced with University (no need to be fancy, and keep in mind this is the English Wikipedia). Don't wikilink 1998 and if 2001 is wikilinked, so also should October 26.
    8. What does "(Frankfurter Stadtbaudezernent)" mean at the end of the second paragraph under History? In paragraph 3, what is "14 hectares park"? Paragraph 4, sentence 2...punctuation problems.
    9. Under History, paragraph 5 says the name was officially changed to General Creighton W. Abrams Building, but the introduction says the U.S. had no authority to change the name. If they had no authority, I'm not certain it could be official.
    10. Years (without months or days) that form the timeline of history should not be wikilinked. Does the office of "Dissing+Weitling" really have a plus symbol in the company name? What does the phrase "After some initial teething problems" mean (I assume its not about teeth)?
    11. Much of the information in the history section repeats the introduction. One or the other, and since the introduction is already too big, I suggest removing some of the content there.
    12. Second to last paragraph in History section: is the president's name "Meissner" or "Meißner"? In either case, the second use needs an apostrophe. What is "AStA" (the red wikilink is not enoough)? Comma after "proposal" should be after "too" also.
    13. The departments of the university should be both capitalized or both not in the last and 3rd to last paragraphs under History.
    14. Under The Building, wikilink "New Objectivity" and get rid of "Neue Sachlichkeit" (redundant, and remember, this is the English dictionary).
    15. The Notes and References sections should be merged and MANY more inline citiations, as well as references (especially if inline cites aren't available) are needed.
  • Needs <ref>s. Article has an interesting topic, and is well translated, with good use of illustrations. In my opinion it is a good candidate for WP:DYK, or a feature someday if citations are added. DVD+ R/W 20:01, 8 July 2006 (UTC)[reply]
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