Wikipedia:Peer review/Winston tastes good like a cigarette should/archive1
I started this article last weekend and it was made "good article" after one day, which definitely exceeded my expectations. Can anyone give me some feedback, and do you think it's on its way to becoming a possible featured article? I would like some good constructive comments. Thanks! Mike H. I did "That's hot" first! 05:16, 19 July 2006 (UTC)
- Great start as ever. I'm not surprised that it made "good article" after one day. Some comments on content. Please bear in mind that I abhor long articles so I won't comment on anything after the first three paragraphs or so because I won't normally read beyond that point.
- Advertising Age ranked the jingle in the top 10, not the campaign.
- Advertising Age gives a couple of copyright dates on that page, 1999 and 2005; from this it's reasonable to infer that the list was compiled in 1999. Give that date.
- The content of the second paragraph is weakly supported; it shows black people and the article content infers that they were targeted. This is reasonable but it would be nice to have a more definitive source for that. It doesn't necessarily convey targeting.
- I'd hate to have to edit this because it contains the new "ref" tags which embed vast amounts of unnecessary clutter amid the content. I do hope somebody will come up with a more sensible way of putting references into a Mediawiki article.
- But it's a great article and I think it's fine as it is, really. Perhaps now it's time to write another one. --Tony Sidaway 04:14, 20 July 2006 (UTC)
- I fixed the first two qualms. The third one needs some more research and I'll try to do that in the next couple of days. I don't know anything about Mediawiki so the refs will have to stay the way they are unless someone else who knows more can fix them. Thanks for the input! Mike H. I did "That's hot" first! 08:24, 20 July 2006 (UTC)
- There's been an ongoing argument about the m:Cite.php system versus the {{ref}} and {{note}} system, where supporters of Cite.php say that it's the new and improved way of doing things, while supporters of {{ref}} and {{note}} say that it doesn't clutter text. Personally, I prefer Cite.php since there's no possibility of writing a ref that doesn't have a corresponding note or vice versa. The argument about article clutter is probably not going to stop, though.
- As far as the article itself goes, I'd like to see an analysis of how Fred Flintstone can continue to power his car with his feet after he's smoked a pack of Winstons. I suspect nobody has researched that, though. To be serious, the article is interesting and well-written. One thing that comes to mind is whether this slogan specifically had any impact on the FCC's decision to end cigarette advertising on television. Are there any other lasting effects of the jingle, besides those mentioned in the intro? --Elkman - (Elkspeak) 18:27, 20 July 2006 (UTC)
- I know the "Winston" jingle was referenced in The Manchurian Candidate, which would be a citation for popular culture. It has been mentioned in other places but I can't name them off the top of my head. As for the FCC, Congress discussed the Winston jingle as well as "Us Tareyton smokers would rather fight than switch!" at length, because they were the catchiest ads seen on TV, and could target the most smokers. Mike H. I did "That's hot" first! 01:41, 21 July 2006 (UTC)
- One point I know of (and endorse, as a grammatical descriptivist!) is that some grammarians have defended "like a cigarette should". Right now you've got Malcolm Gladwell and a dictionary. I think there's a glaring omission, though, in that there's nothing in the article about the actual taste of Winstons (not that I would know). Why did they choose this selling point, and how did it fit into the cigarette advertising climate of the day? Were Winstons considered a better-tasting cigarette before the campaign? That would add helpful context. --Dhartung | Talk 19:53, 20 July 2006 (UTC)
- Winstons were two months old when the "Winston tastes good" campaign started. I believe I read somewhere that what set Winstons apart from other cigarettes was that they were only carried in filters, while most cigarettes were only starting to switch from unflitered. The full Winston jingle song describes the filter advantage as "The filter lets the flavor through!" I am at a loss as to where to put that, though. Mike H. I did "That's hot" first! 01:39, 21 July 2006 (UTC)
- Please see automated peer review suggestions here. Thanks, AZ t 15:32, 21 July 2006 (UTC)