Wikipedia:Reference desk/Archives/Language/2019 June 25

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June 25

Bear/Abide/Stand

Hello, I was wondering what are the differences between to abide, to bear and to stand. I assume in the negative they mean the same. But in the positive they don’t. I’d appreciate any help. Thanks! Miss Bono ^{[hello, hello!]} 12:03, 25 June 2019 (UTC)

They are similar in usage, but have different meaning in the use of "I cannot X this." Abide: Allow it to exist. Bear: Suffer through it. Stand: Support it. In use, they all mean that you don't support whatever it is. You can use whichever term you like the most, but if you want to be very exact, you use abide if it doesn't truly affect you. You use bear if it does affect you. You use stand if it is something you are expected to support. 12.207.168.3 (talk) 12:11, 25 June 2019 (UTC)

In my own judgement (which may or may not be representative of many speakers of L1 English):

(1) "I can't abide/bear/stand the racket from upstairs."

(2) "Can you bear/stand/^?abide the racket from upstairs."

(3) *"I can abide/bear/stand the sound of the radio from upstairs."

(The asterisk means "ungramatical". A question mark means "dubious".)

If sentence (2) were clearly grammatical with abide, I'd say: Simple, each of these three verbs is a negative polarity item (NPI). However, it sounds odd. My first guess is that "can't abide" is more fossilized an idiom than "can't bear" and "can't stand" are. (As it is, in my English at least, "can't" in (1) can't be replaced by "don't".)

As an NPI, one of these verbs can't be used in a positive declarative sentence clause in this sense (or anyway can't without sounding archaic). It can of course be used in other senses:

(4) "I'll abide by the judgement."

(5) "The columns bore all the weight."

(6) "The decision still stands."

I presume that Wiktionary and the like will explain. -- Hoary (talk) 12:24, 25 June 2019 (UTC) amended 12:49, 25 June 2019 (UTC)

Thanks. Could you give an example of the usage of abide? I am not a native speaker, and I hadn’t seen that word until very recently. Thanks. Miss Bono ^{[hello, hello!]}

In US English, "bear" and "stand" are common, but "abide" is less so. I'd only use it in a formal context, like a written report. SinisterLefty (talk) 12:43, 25 June 2019 (UTC)

I've already given you one; but if you're asking about "can't abide" versus "can't stand/bear", then I'd say that to me it merely sounds old-fashioned. However, see Google ngram viewer. -- Hoary (talk) 12:55, 25 June 2019 (UTC)

To abide originally meant more like to wait or to remain,[1] as with the hymn, "Abide with Me". ←Baseball Bugs ^{What's up, Doc?} carrots→ 15:12, 25 June 2019 (UTC)

• I can't put up with this sort of thing. DuncanHill (talk) 15:22, 25 June 2019 (UTC)
  • Or even tolerate it https://www.spellzone.com/dictionary/tolerate -- Roger (Dodger67) (talk) 15:46, 25 June 2019 (UTC)
    • The King James Bible has "But who may abide the day of His coming" (Malachi 3:2), while most modern translations go for "But who can endure the day of his coming?". Alansplodge (talk) 17:09, 26 June 2019 (UTC)

• US English native: #3 above is a bit iffy. Those terms can be grammatical in the positive, it seems to me. "How is the weather there? Hot but bearable". "My commute is difficult but I can stand it". I don't know about "abide". "Stand" seems like an idiomatic synonym of tolerate. Bear (as in bear a burden, also used in terms like "ball bearing") has a different origin but ends up meaning about the same. 173.228.123.207 (talk) 04:55, 26 June 2019 (UTC)

• For British English, at least, try the Oxford Dictionaries definitions. As British English is not prescribed or formally defined, these reflect usage abide(2), bear(3), stand(4.1) Bazza (talk) 09:12, 26 June 2019 (UTC)

In the UK (or at least here in London), "cannot abide" is sometimes heard, but any other use is distinctly archaic. Alansplodge (talk) 19:49, 26 June 2019 (UTC)

In my BrEng experience the commonest use of "abide" is in the form "If there's one thing I can't abide it's x". For usage of some of the others - There are many things I can stand (but not like), and others I can just about bear, but I cannot put up with those horrible American commas all over Wikipedia. DuncanHill (talk) 09:07, 27 June 2019 (UTC)