Wikipedia talk:Featured article candidates/George Went Hensley/archive2
Latest comment: 12 years ago by Mark Arsten
Adressed comments by Crisco 1492
edit- Lede
- holiness - Seems like an unnecessary easter egg to me
- Is wikilinking illiterate necessary?
- "He had many conflicts with his family owing to his drunkenness, frequent travels and inability to earn a steady income, and these factors were cited by his first three wives as reasons for their divorces." -- A little unwieldy. Perhaps "He had many conflicts with his family owing to his drunkenness, frequent travels and inability to earn a steady income; these factors were cited by his first three wives as reasons for their divorces."
- "Hensley was arrested in Tennessee on moonshine-related charges and sentenced to a term in a workhouse, from which he escaped and fled the state. " -- Noting if this was during Prohibition would be helpful
More to follow Crisco 1492 (talk) 06:13, 14 March 2012 (UTC)
- Early life
- "One of 13 children, Hensley moved with his family to Ooltewah, Tennessee, and Big Stone Gap, Virginia, where he witnessed an elderly woman handle a snake during a revival service at a coal mining camp." - Chronology? (When, roughly?)
- Ministry
- ("And these signs shall follow them that believe; In my name... They shall take up serpents" Mark 16:17–18, KJV) -- Should there be a comma or semi-colon separating the quote and the verse?
- Church of God and snake handling
- This and the above section may need to be merged
- Grasshopper Valley - Worth a redlink?
- Resignation from the Church of God
- Couple of these sections are quite short...
- Return to ministry
- Reason for the divorce?
- "While ministering at a Salvation Army church in Ohio, Hensley met Irene Klunzinger." - Any idea when?
- Ministry in Tennessee
- "Hensley continued to travel around Tennessee, encountering a mixed reception from those who were aware of his past." -- "receiving a mixed reception", perhaps?
- Final years
- Wife's name?
- I'd merge that last sentence
- Personal life
- "Relatives of Hensley traveled to Chattanooga to care for her." -- "Hensley's relatives..."?
- Any way to merge that last paragraph so we don't have a little stubby paragraph down there? Or expand it?
- Death
- Glossolalia -- Perhaps speaking in tongues, for greater general understanding? Crisco 1492 (talk) 06:48, 14 March 2012 (UTC)
- "although his wife Sally stated that she believed it was the will of God." -- No issue, just an interesting line.
- "Sally resolved to continue spreading her late husband's teachings, claiming after the incident that she had not lost "an ounce of faith".[50]" -- How'd she do with that? Any success? Crisco 1492 (talk) 06:48, 14 March 2012 (UTC)
- Not as nice a read as your last one, but still quite interesting. Crisco 1492 (talk) 06:48, 14 March 2012 (UTC)
- Ahh, that was a high bar though :) Alright, I have done all but the glossolalia one, I can't think of a good way to make "speaking in tongues" fit. I'll defer to Astynax on what to do there. Mark Arsten (talk) 18:17, 14 March 2012 (UTC)
- Looks much better. Just waiting on glossolalia. Crisco 1492 (talk) 23:09, 14 March 2012 (UTC)
- Ok, seeing as it was somewhat tangential I removed it. Mark Arsten (talk) 23:31, 14 March 2012 (UTC)
- Looks much better. Just waiting on glossolalia. Crisco 1492 (talk) 23:09, 14 March 2012 (UTC)
- Ahh, that was a high bar though :) Alright, I have done all but the glossolalia one, I can't think of a good way to make "speaking in tongues" fit. I'll defer to Astynax on what to do there. Mark Arsten (talk) 18:17, 14 March 2012 (UTC)